Never Stopped Loving You
by Future Lines
Summary: Sequel to My Gravity. Renesmee is stuck in the ancient walls of Volterra, where she believes she will stay forever. But an unexpected event, may just cause her secret to be exposed. And will those who love her, ever get her out? **ON HIATUS**
1. Prologue

_Hello again and although it has only been short since I last updated the final chapter of My Gravity, here is the first update for Never Stopped Loving You._

_As my prologue is short, I've included chapter one with this but it'll go back to one chapter per week._

* * *

Prologue

A few dictionary definitions crossed my mind.  
Warmth, the sensation caused by heat energy. Heat, the form of energy that is transferred by a difference in temperature.

A few definitions of my own crossed my mind.  
Warmth, being hold close by the guy that makes your world turn. Heat, Jacob Black.

Yeah, I guess I was dreaming. But those eyes were telling me something different.

* * *

_I'm also thinking up getting a Beta for this story, so tell me if you know anyone who would be willing. _


	2. Chapter 1: Stares

_Here is chapter one, which I believe some of you have been waiting for._

* * *

Chapter One

Cold, death, emptiness. Pretty much how I would describe my life. Don't get me wrong, this hospitality is really generous, if you weren't being locked in a tower.  
I can't remember much about how I came to be here. I wasn't living then, more of a walking corpse. I just remember waking up today and thinking how the hell did I get here? It was today that I noticed what was going on.  
I sat up in my bed, drenched with the usual sweat. Was it usual? I had the feeling it was. I breathed slowly, trying to calm myself. I had been running from something with claw like hands, running but not moving. I gathered this happened every night.  
Glancing at the little analogue clock on the white bedside table, I saw it was probably an acceptable time to get out of bed. Doing so, I saw clothes lain out on a white dresser matching my bedside table. A note attached read in cursive writing:

Dear Miss Cullen,

As usual, your clothing is out for you, courtesy of Angela. New linen dress set, I presume. Please inquire at front desk, as there is another message for you down there.

Yours Truthfully,  
Aro.

Ha, truthfully. Like I even know you. So, I get my clothes done for me. What am I, five? I giggled, but it sounded sinister. I was five.  
I studied the material in front of me. Linen, the expensive kind. I knew the designer brand from Alice. Wait, wasn't I supposed to feel grief? Not be able to say their names or even think of them? Yet here I was, happily flicking through my memories. There was always something wrong with my brain. I knew that from the minute I agreed to this. I wondered if they were thinking about me, if they planned to do anything to get me out of here. I hoped not, it was pointless. I was in a fortress, locked in a turret.  
I remember slipping vague items of clothing on, these past few days, weeks, months or maybe even years. Today, I payed close attention to what I was provided with.  
A dark green pleated skirt that fell just above my knees. A white tuck in blouse accomplished it, the buttons a matching green to the skirt. I pulled on cream stockings, close to my skin tone. I figured it was close enough for human eyes. I laced up the black shoes. School type shoes, you know the ones, with a small chunky heel attached. The next item was a lighter green cardigan that stopped at my hips. It seemed I had to look wealthy or something because jewellery was supplied too. Hell, I might as well look the part. There was a silver hair clip with blue stones around the edges. I 'd been told blue went well with my skin. I pulled the front section of my hair back with it, covering up my path. Next, I clasped a silver bracelet on my left wrist; it had patterns carved on to it. I wondered if it was antique. The last addition was a pair of pearl earrings. I hoped they hadn't been used previously. I studied the image in the mirror, more commonly known as me. The girl looked older, taller, curvier and hair about two inches longer. I looked closer to seventeen then sixteen. My copper curls hung same as usual, bouncing with each movement. The natural blush that covered my cheeks, embarrassed or not, was gone. It made me look swallower. I liked it; I didn't want to look happy here.

I crossed the marble floor to the white wooden door and opened it. I was greeted by a vampire scent and toned guard, who snapped to attention as soon as I stepped out. He gawked at me. I must look more alive than I have in ages.

"Follow me," he said, recovering and briskly walked down the corridor.

I walked slower, letting my eyes trail over the paintings that lined the corridor. Some looked like they dated back to the sixteen hundreds. The walk was short, descending a flight of stairs and left into what I presumed was a foyer. I followed the guard in and saw three vampires and one human in the room. The human looked at me, no, stared, when I entered. She was pretty, mid-thirties, with black, straight hair. She looked like she was proud of her looks. The vampires stopped whispering when they heard my entrance. What was with people staring today?

"Hello Renesmee," one of the male vampires spoke, offering me his hand

I stared at his hand until it dropped away. I think I was supposed to shake it. Or kiss it. Who knew?

"I'm not sure you remember me," he continued

I shook my head. I don't think I was used to talking.

"I'm Calix," he answered

I recalled that Calix meant 'handsome' in Greek. I studied him. He had blond hair that fell into what I presumed were normally ruby eyes but were covered by contacts, which made them a muddy brown. He wasn't heavily built, but tall and thin and looked around twenty. If I didn't know better, I would guess him to still have the awkwardness of a teenager. I admit he was good looking, but not my type. In other words, not Jacob. I bet Jacob would kill him an instant if he could see the way Calix was looking at me. I was somewhat flattered, I'm sure I would be plain next to any vampire.

"This is Lysander and Euclid," Calix said gesturing to the short dark one first and then the other tall one.

"Hi," I said

They seemed near laughter. It wasn't that funny. Before an awkward silence could occur, I crossed the room to where the receptionist woman was.

"You have a message for me?" I questioned, looking at her name badge that read Tiffany

"Yes," she told me icily and handed a folded piece of paper.

Curious, I opened it, barely noticing it was thick, like parchment. Inside was another cursive written note.

Dearest Renesmee,

Please let Calix lead you out to the town, for breakfast at a trusted restaurant. He is eager to meet you, as he has heard much about you. Later on, he will discuss important matters, so please be attentive.

Yours truthfully,  
Aro.

I sighed, I did not have any intention of going anywhere with this Calix. Then again, it had been a while since I'd stepped out of this hotel like building or eaten anything beside very rare meat. I refused to hunt humans with them and they thought I would prefer my food bloody.  
I saw a small garbage bin in the corner near the door, and went to put the note in the bin. Suddenly the three vampires had me up against the wall. It took me a second to realise why.

"I wasn't go to run," I muttered, "That would be really stupid."

Calix chuckled and held up a hand and I was released. Slowly, to prove my point, I walked back to the bin and disposed of the parchment thingy.

"Shall we go?" Calix offered

I nodded and grudgingly accepted the arm he offered. I was used to old-fashioned manners back at home. Ah, home. I continued to think of nothing else as we walked through the pebbled streets. I wondered again if I was some hideous monster that didn't really care about my family, if I could think of them so easily.  
After walking straight for a while, Calix pulled me into a doorstep. He pushed the door and a friendly sounding bell rung. I saw all heads turn up automatically at the sound of our entrance. I saw a few dirty looks mixed with awe. I guessed we looked like a couple. The admiration however, I could not understand. The compare showed us to a booth towards the back of the diner. I was grateful, as I hated being looked at.

"So," Calix started

"So," I copied

He put his clasped hands on the table. I crossed my legs.

"This isn't awkward," I muttered, earning a laugh.

Great, I was Miss Entertainment. I wondered when I had gotten so sarcastic. This thought pulled me into a daydream and only a distant voice pulled me out of my reverie.

"Hello I'm Kelly, and I will be your server today," the woman said in a heavy Italian accent, "Here are you menus and what can I get you to drink?"

Here, Calix looked a little lost so I spoke instead.

"One cappuccino and a latte,"

The girl smiled and turned in the direction of the kitchen.

"I hope you do not wish me to actually drink coffee," he said trying to make a joke

I raised an eyebrow at the lameness and opened the menu. The restaurant was called Per Sempre. I chose frittatas for both of us. I kind of had a little pleasure in wasting the Volturi's money or at least Calix's. Our server returned with our drinks and I placed the order.  
I sipped cautiously at the latte and was delighted to find it hot. I finished my drink in silence, while Calix pored his out onto a nearby pot plant, inconspicuously. I devoured the food when it came, surprised at how hungry I was. When I finished I was eager to escape but Calix doused my hopes.

"How about you order something else, so we can talk?"

I scowled at him and he chuckled again. I ordered hazelnut cinnamon rolls when Kelly came to take our plates. Once they arrived, he began.

"We need to discuss your stay at Volterra,"

* * *

_I've mapped out the chapters for the rest of this story and decided that there is going to be another story after this one, following the same storyline. Just thought I'd give some hope that this isn't going to end in killing everyone off. Yet._ :)

_Oh and I've been looking for this story everywhere, but I can't remember what it was called or who it was by, so if anyone knows what it's called I'd really like to know. Wait, I better describe it. Ok, so it's like these different imprint stories about Kim/Jared, Embry and this other girl which I think is called Charlotte and then another one about Jacob and another girl who was blind or something. It was really good, so if anyone knows, yeah._

_Review, however much it pleases you. That was my lame attempt at rhyming. _


	3. Chapter 2: Thirty Eight Minutes

_I've started to put up 'previously' before the chapter starts, because I find sometimes I forget which chapter I read last (in other stories) and I remember from the last lines. I also forget to use that new bookmark thing._

_I know I'm updating this a little earlier than normal, but I've been home from school coz I'm sick, so I've had more time._

* * *

Chapter Two

Previously:

"We need to discuss your stay at Volterra,"

* * *

I nodded. That seemed to be part of my vocabulary alot now.

Calix smiled, "You have not been a nuisance, as I perceive. We have unfortunately come in to some trouble with a human family and we need to monitor things there."

"What trouble?" I asked, my voice cracking for some unknown reason

This wasn't the question he hoped I would ask; he looked uncomfortable. I waited patiently.

"One of our members attacked a woman from the family and we believe someone may have seen,"

I shuddered; I knew all too well what a sight that was. Then I was disgusted, the Volturi didn't seem to care what the family was going through, but about saving their skin.

"When you say monitoring, you mean-?" I had a feeling I was going to be the monitor

"We are thinking about placing someone in the house acting as a replacement mother as there are children. A human wouldn't suffice as they would need to be on guard the whole time. A vampire might cause some unease, as the father knows what happened. As you see, we were in a dilemma. Then you happened to come along, Renesmee, and our problems were solved. I understand humans feel comfort around you?"

I shrugged, still too shocked to speak.

"Good. So, we would love if you Renesmee were to place yourself in that house and keep an eye, so to speak, on the thoughts and feelings of the children present,"

"You want me to be some kind of foster mother?" I managed to say

"If you like,"

"Do I have a choice, whether or not to go?"

Calix smiled, "I'm afraid not, but I was being courteous."

I sighed, another addition to my non-speaking vocabulary.

"Fine," I snapped and stood up, "Can we go?"

He smiled again and signalled the server. She came over, the plastic smile plastered across her face.

"The bill?"

"Yes please," I asked and she pulled a piece of paper from her apron pocket

Calix took it and placed the amount with a large tip on the counter. Once again, he offered me his arm and I took it, scowling. During my observations through the quiet meal, I had noticed old-fashioned manners were common here. I remembered then, that I hadn't touched the cinnamon rolls and felt a little guilty. Even with all the money in the world, my parents had hated wasting food. I missed them a lot. Again, I was confronted with the idea of having a malfunctioned brain. In all the books I'd read, people couldn't think of the ones they had left behind. Maybe a position in the Volturi was a perfect place for me, after all.

I was vaguely aware that we were walking through streets, so I was surprised when I was led through the revolving doors of the Volturi hotel. The receptionist, Tiffany, looked as cold towards me as ever and then smiled brightly at Calix.

"Good afternoon sir, I trust your meal was good?"

"Yes it was, thank you Tiffany, although I wasn't particularly hungry,"

She just nodded. I wondered if she knew what went on with the owners of this place. Calix let go of my arm and hung up his coat on a stand nearby.

"Send that up to my room, please" he told the receptionist and turned to me, "You may go back to your room now Renesmee, no need to pack, your things have been sent already."

"I didn't know I owned anything," I muttered which made him laugh

The same guard who was at my door this morning, greeted me at the stairs and led me to my room.

"Do you stay here the whole time?" I asked before closing the door

He frowned and nodded. I guess he had thought I would have noticed by now.

"What's your name?"

"Christian," he replied, more confused

"Ok Christian, what is the date today?"

"Twenty first ma'am,"

"Thanks," I answered vaguely, counting backwards in my head.

I closed the door and realised I didn't know the month. I re-opened the door and Christian whipped his head back to me.

"What month?" I asked, trusting him to remember our previous conversation

"July miss,"

"Thanks again," I told him and added a smile

I headed back to my room and a few seconds after I closed the door, I heard the lock click. Yep, I was still a prisoner. After a quick calculation, today was my forty- seventh day there. Nearly two months of walking corpse girl.

I surveyed the room. On the left corner, there was a double bed, with a heavily decorated cover. Next to the bed was a window, in the shape of a circle. I crossed to the window and was sad to find it locked. I turned and checked out the rest of the place. The matching dresser, which I had already noticed was in the right corner, with another cupboard on the wall next to it. On the wall opposite the bed, was a white desk, including a desk lamp and parchment and pens. I walked towards it. I couldn't see any dust and with the made bed and vase of flowers on the dresser, I figured there was someone who came into clean.

With nothing to do, I went back to the window and looked at the view. It looked over the main square and I could see the major Volturi fortress opposite this building. Hundreds of people were swarming in the square over the local market and the few cafes around the perimeter. Remembering that Tiffany had said 'good afternoon', I turned to the little clock, curious for the time.

"Twelve o'clock," I said aloud as the silence was getting to me.

I decided to go to talk to Christian, as he probably thought I was a nutcase already. I knocked on the door and waited for him to open it.

"Yes?" he asked, confused again

"Hi,"

"Uh, hello,"

"So, what's happening?"

"Nothing," he looked at me strangely

"I bet,"

"Is there some point to this ma'am?"

"No, I'm just bored,"

"I can imagine,"

I laughed, as it was something to do.

Christian gave me that weird look again.

"Sorry," I apologised

"What for?"

I shrugged, "For being weird,"

This time he laughed.

"Do you happen to know when I'm leaving?"

"Sorry miss I don't, but I believe it is not for a few hours,"

I sighed. He nodded. I sighed again. He gave me the look.

"This is eventful," I muttered

"It is a lot more interesting than my previous activities,"

"Yeah, Miss Entertainment,"

Christian gave the look again.

"It's a personal joke, with myself," I laughed at how stupid that sounded

"I didn't know that was possible," he looked like he was trying to hold laughter in

"It is if you're me. And you can laugh,"

With this, he burst out in low chuckles and I joined him. We laughed until I seriously though I would be as toned as Jacob. Yum; Jacob.

I heard too late, the footsteps approaching.

"What's going on here," a vampire snapped. I think he was Euclid.

"Nothing sir," Christian said, standing straight and facing the wall opposite.

I nodded in agreement, "Just asking where the bathroom was."

I put on my innocent face and Euclid rolled his eyes.

"I believe there is door inside the room leading to your private bathroom," Christian said, monotone, playing along

"Thank you," I nodded to both vampires and turned back inside.

I didn't hear Euclid (if that was him) leave so I decided to make my lie clear and searched for the door. I found it near the desk wall, in the corner. I was grey like the rest of the room, so I had missed it.

I opened and found a large marble room, threatening the size of even Alice's bathroom. It was complete with a large spa bath and a long mirror with little lights surrounding it. The bathroom didn't fit in with the rest of the décor.

I saw a cabinet under the counter with the mirror and opened it. I found a hairbrush, toothbrush and toothpaste, hair ties and a make-up bag. I decided to brush my teeth and attack my hair with the hairbrush. It was knotty, as it got when I hadn't washed it in a while. I gave up and went for a shower. After combing and blow-drying (that cabinet had many drawers) my now silky locks, I ignored the make-up and fixed up the bathroom. I left and went back to sit on the bed. After five minutes of boredom, I went to the desk and doodled over the paper. I suddenly felt artistic and grabbed the pad of paper (it was under the parchment) and dragged the chair from the desk and put it in front of the window. I sketched the even busier square (it was around lunchtime) and then the Volturi building. I also sketched the horizon.

Once I was done, the clock showed two thirty so I put the clean paper back on the table and then decided to address the drawing to people. The one with the square I dedicated to the cleaner and put it on the desk. The horizon I decided to give to Christian when I left and the Volturi building to Tiffany. They all had significance to the people I chose. The busy square was to show how much work the cleaner had to do and how she was trapped (or so I thought) inside. The horizon was for how Christian wanted something bigger to do. I gave the Volturi building to Tiffany because I guess she wanted to join them someday. It was better than death. Nearly.

A knock on the door was timed perfectly as I was now bored again.

"Yeah?" I called, crossing the room to the door

"Miss Cullen, if you are ready to leave now?" Calix asked

I nodded and grabbed the sketches and headed for the door.

"Here," I handed the drawing to Christian, ignoring the looks from both men

I followed Calix down the stairs. In the foyer, there was an ensemble of vampires. Aro, Jane, Felix, Alec and Demetrius were all standing there waiting for me. I didn't think it was much of an occasion that the important (or so they thought) vampires had to be there.

"Renesmee dear, it has been long," Aro addressed me and Jane scowled at his politeness.

I smiled and nodded accepting the handshake, knowing he was about to read all the thoughts I had ever had.

"You have become very amusing these past few hours,"

I gathered he was talking about my sudden sarcasm that came from being a walking corpse. I nodded again.

"Ready to go then?" Calix asked

"Yes, I presume she is ready,"

I found it funny how they talked about me like I wasn't there, so I laughed. The company gave me a weird look and Jane looked smug. I shook my head in answer to their silent questioning looks and walked towards Tiffany.

"Here," I said, "Thanks so much for your kindness,"

She took the paper automatically and it took her a moment to work out I was being sarcastic. This led her to scowl and say, "No need to be so rude to your elders."

"You should behave to a child how you want them to behave as they learn from you," I retorted with a fake smile.

The vampires laughed and Aro gestured for me to walk with him as Alec opened the door. Jane's scowl deepened.

"Why you are a jealous one," I muttered under my breath, knowing she would hear

"Be grateful that our code stops her from attacking you," Calix said, coming to join us

I smiled again. I added smiling to my mental list of non-speaking vocabulary. The name had lengthened which somehow made me laugh again. Yep, definitely deranged. I wondered if mentally confused people knew they were mentally confused. Maybe if you knew, you were even more mentally confused.

The group led me to a black limousine with Volterra flags on the ends like you see in movies. Felix (who was my mortal enemy for giving me bruises which stayed for ages, forty-seven days ago, which I somehow remember although other stuff is a blur. Maybe that is how Alice sees my future. It seems my sudden awakeness had made me more thoughtful. Or maybe it was the solitude that I had been unused to but used to now) slid into the driver's seat and Demetrius next to him. Jane and Alec opted for the middle seats, which left Calix, Aro and I to the end ones. Great.

The drive out of Volterra's main square was quiet as I avoided any conversation openers. Instead, I watched the stone go by as we turned into the part with all the houses. The houses matched each other, grey stone buildings one storey tall but elongated. I could see very few front gardens but each house was built so that the back was facing a thick wood.

After about thirty-eight minutes, Felix turned into driveway of one of the grey houses.


	4. Chapter 3: Then There Was Gabby

Chapter Three

Previously:

After about thirty-eight minutes, Felix turned into driveway of one of the grey houses.

* * *

Only Aro and I stepped out of the car, which made the size of the party even more confusing. We walked to the front door (which was made of wood, not stone) and Aro seized the black knocker and banged it. I heard hurried footsteps make their way to the door and after a few moments where the person flustered with the lock and key, the door opened.

In the frame stood a man in his late thirties and brown hair with a hint of grey. His face was strained when he saw who was at the door but surprised when he saw me.

"Hello George," Aro said, smiling, in his gentle voice that persuaded all

"Aro," the man, George, said in a voice that matched his facial expression

"As promised, I have brought someone to help," Aro gestured to me which made George's eyebrows shoot up.

"Come in then," he said politely and stepped aside to let us in.

I walked through a short hallway of white walls and a painting of a harbour. It ended in an arch, which opened up into a kitchen, lounge room and dining room. I liked open plan houses. The kitchen was to the left of the house (if you stood out the front) with the dining room opposite below. The lounge was to the right of the house, a little further away from the kitchen than the dining room. I saw another passageway at the end of the room, which I presumed led to the bedrooms and bathrooms. George took us to the lounge room and seated us on the white leather couches.

"Coffee?" he asked, still flustered

"Not for me," Aro replied

George turned to me, "And you Miss-?'

"Renesmee. Renesmee Cullen," I answered feeling like a female version of James Bond, "Yes please."

He nodded distracted, and walked quickly over to the kitchen and a coffee machine. His removal let me survey the room further. The walls were white, with a deep blue wall at the end of the room. The lounge room had armchairs that matched the couches and a plasma television placed on a marble counter. In the middle was a dark red coffee table. Italians liked coffee. I turned my head to the dining room, which consisted of a table and chairs. The table was a rectangle (no kidding, but it could have been circular) with eight matching chairs of mahogany wood. Like mom's hair. There goes the emotionless beast again, thinking of home without pain.

George returned with the coffee and I sipped it, grateful they liked their coffee hot in Volterra. Coffee was disgusting cold. I liked heat.

Aro wasted no time, "As I said before, I have brought Renesmee here to assist you,"

George nodded. I nodded. Aro nodded. I laughed. George looked at me weirdly. Aro ignored me. I sighed.

"So, what do I have to do?" I asked trying to break the silence

"I have to work," George began nervously, "I need you to keep an eye on the kids. I've got a three year old, sixteen year old and seventeen year old," he dug out his wallet and showed me pictures of three very attractive children. The woman, who they resembled, was present in one photo and I assumed she was the one 'attacked'.

"Ok, babysitting. Anything else?" I avoid the topic of the age gaps

George looked embarrassed, "I can't cook very well and as I'm not here most of the time, the house cleaning is often left to the children."

I nodded enthusiastically trying to ease his pain, "No problem. When do I start?"

Aro laughed quietly and after a minute George joined him and I sat there, feeling perplexed.

"It seems I must leave you now, George," Aro announced suddenly, standing up.

"Yes of course, I don't want to keep you," George stood as well and led Aro to the door.

I trailed after him, with nothing better to do, figuring I might earn some brownie points if I was polite. Brownie points for what, I did not know.

Aro shook George's hand and when Aro withdrew, I saw George give a tiny shiver. Must be the cold.

"Renesmee," he said once and if he had been wearing a hat, I bet he would have touched it, and turned and walked out the door.

We stood at the doorway and watched the black limo dive off.

"Well," I said, another silence breaker.

George ran a hand threw his hair and glanced at the leather watch on his wrist. His eyebrows had the tendency to shoot up into his hairline when surprised.

"I'm afraid I can only give you a basic tour before I have to leave," he apologised while walking back into the main room quickly.

"That's okay," I told him

"As you can tell this is the dining area (he pointed to each section in turn), lounge room and kitchen. Basic appliances, here, nothing too hard to use" he walked in to the kitchen, "Coffee machine is pretty easy to use y-."

I cut him off, "I have a similar one at home,"

"Oh, okay. That makes things a lot easier," he admitted

I smiled at him, I actually wanted to laugh, George was so anxious all the time. I followed (being sheep today) him to the end passage but were greeted with an expected person coming out of it.

The first time I saw Gabriella James I thought she was drunk. A small figure came out of the hall, laughing to herself. First, she wasn't in school (as it was Tuesday or something like that), had bed hair and looked drained. I saw her shoot me a confused look before laughing again.

"Okay. Yeah, no kidding. Okay. Yep," and talking to herself too, "Anyway, gotta go Stace. Ok see ya soon. Bye,"

Oh, now I saw the little silver cell phone pressed to her ear.

"Gabby, what are you doing here?" George asked looking flustered, while pressing buttons of the blackberry that he took from his pocket during my observations.

"I have a cold, father," she said, Captain Obvious, as she coughed through the sentence

"Stand on your head for half an hour," I offered, "Gets rid of blocked noses."

"Yeah, right," Gabby rolled her eyes at me, "And may I ask who are you?"

She also had attitude problems.

"This is Renesmee," George said, still distracted, "She's going to help around the house."

"Like a maid?"

"No more like a foster mother," I intervened, curious for her reaction.

I saw her eyebrows shoot up, like her fathers did, "But you're like ten!"

"I'm nineteen," I lied quickly, hoping I could pass for it.

"Yeah and I'm ten foot," she quickly held up her hand as I was about to respond, "But I don't care, as long as you don't go all evil stepmother like. Even better, just don't go maternal."

Blunt too. George then cursed loudly (and Gabby called out "Children present" but I bet she uses worse).

"I have to go. My funds are about to be cancelled," he explained while grabbing a black briefcase off the table, "I'm sorry to leave you here Renesmee, but I'm sure Gabriella will fill you in."

"Oh thanks," Gabby muttered, soft enough that only my super-powered ears could hear.

"That's okay," I called but he had already left. Must be important.

"So," I said drumming my fingers on the kitchen counter.

Gabby sat on the dining table and swung her legs. I sighed in relief that sitting on tables wasn't out of bounds; it was a habit since birth. I propped myself onto the kitchen counter. Hating awkward silences, I had to break it.

"What time do you other siblings get here?"

"Didn't dad tell you their names?" she asked bored

"No, he just showed me pictures," now that I thought about it, I hardly new anything about the people I had to 'babysit'.

"Well the baby's David and my brother is brother. David's a boy, obviously, and he is at child care. My brother is at school and will arrive in about five minutes,"

"Oh okay. Do I need to pick up David or your other brother?" I was desperate to get this right.

I have no idea why. Oh yeah, maybe because people's lives now depend on me. Well, not quite but almost. I had this sudden rush of realisation. This is kind of, what it felt like to be a mom, without the confusion of who the children actually were.

"Yeah, at four. And I like your name, other brother. He walks; the school is like five minutes away if you cut through the bush,"

"The bush!" I yelled, I was used to telling humans to avoid it

"Calm down woman. Everyone goes through it, there are tracks all through it," Gabby seemed to have eye rolling in her non-speaking vocabulary list.

"Oh okay. Sorry for freaking out, but where I came from it wasn't safe in the woods,"

"Uh huh," I could tell I had lost her interest as she was texting on her phone

I glanced at the clock, three thirty; I suppose I should find out where this day care was.

"Do you happen to know where the place is?" I felt like a tourist

Without looking up Gabby replied, "Directions on the refrigerator,"

"Thanks," I mumbled, already pulling the magnet off the fridge

I looked at the words and realised I had no sense of direction here. I didn't even know what street I was on.

"Gabby, we need a taxi," I announced miserably

"Why?" at least this time I sparked some sign of life from her

"I've never been here before,"

"Everything is on the main road, duh,"

"No I mean, like never been to Italy before,"

She turned to face me surprised, "I forgot you had an accent. American hey?"

"Yeah. Aren't you?"

Gabby nodded again, "I was born there. We are not Italian at all."

"You don't happen to know where it is?"

"I'll come with you," she offered jumping off the table

It seemed my character analysis of Gabby was slightly wrong. She was lifefull (instead of lifeless) when she chose. But wasn't anyone lifefull when they chose. The way my brain worked would never be explained. It was like a mathematical expression, in a test that someone got wrong, but the marker didn't know how that someone got the answer they did. And the someone died or something and you couldn't ask them how.

"Thanks," today was full of thanks and ohs and yeahs and sorrys

Gabby walked to the front hall and to a light brown table I had missed. There was a glass bowl and in it were hundreds of keys. Okay, there were twelve but it's a figure of speech. Oh dear, I'm arguing with myself. Pathetic.

Gabby pulled out car keys, "I'll drive today and you can watch, then tomorrow you'll know where to go,"

I nodded, glad that I had supersonic memory. She strode out the door and turned right into a garage that was about half the size of the one at home. I guessed that meant theirs was big. Here we go with the theirs and ours, this lack of pain towards home was getting annoying. There were times when you wished you were normal. I wasn't the ours anymore but the theirs. If that makes sense.

Gabby was already in the car by the time I had finished looking around. The garage was plain red brick, with another small car and the end. The space in the middle, I figured, must have been for George's car.

I opened the door to the people mover (there had to be twenty seats in there) and slid into the passenger seat. I buckled up and waited for Gabby and her human reflexes, to get going.

She raced out of the driveway and down the road. I winced every time we exceeded the speed limit on the busy roads. It wasn't that the speed was unusual, vampires and werewolves like to drive fast. Running was a lot faster than driving too. It was the fact that she didn't have super senses. It would be all too easy to crash, lose control of a way to fast moving car. I decided to do the driving, starting from the tomorrow.

I noted the landmarks and roads needed to get to the childcare place. We got there just over half past. That speeding was a good thing in some ways.

It was the customary red brick, an elongated one-storey building. The car park was small and barely full, so I guessed that we had come at the quiet time or it just wasn't that popular. The people mover didn't seem out of place either.

Gabby pulled a laminated card out from one of the many slots in the car.

"Here, this is the license. Lets you take the kid out, makes sure you're not a stranger,"

I nodded and accepted the card I slid out of the car and made for the door entitled entry.

I heard the automatic window wind down, but didn't turn until I heard Gabby speak.

"You need to sign at the front desk every time you come and leave. David's in the second blue door on the left,"

"Okay, thanks," I told her and turned back to the entrance.

When I stepped into the brightly lit room, I wasn't expecting to find what I did.

No way in hell. Well, maybe no way in Volturi land, it's practically the same thing.

* * *

_Sorry for the mini cliffhanger, the chapter was turning into a short story and I needed to end it. I'll just say I'm being professional or something. That really didn't make sense so I'm just going to shut up now._


	5. Chapter 4: Boiled Spinach

_Exciting news, if you haven't already heard it, because I went a little overboard and put it up everywhere. My Gravity (the one before this) has been nominated for the Indie Twific Awards, which recognizes new fan fiction writers. It's been nominated for the Best Non ExB Storyline, so if you've read it and like to vote, head to www(dot)theindietwificawards(dot)com  
__Voting starts on the 7__th__ July 2009_

_Disclaimer: Glad to say I own a few characters that come from my brain but no Renesmee Cullen or Jane. I'm not that original._

* * *

Chapter Four

Previously:

When I stepped into the brightly lit room, I wasn't expecting to find what I did.

No way in hell. Well, maybe no way in Volturi land, it's practically the same thing.

* * *

The room looked normal, shiny wooden floors, a bright blue counter with a mahogany top. Baskets of papers where lined across one end of the desk, with neat labels, the kind of handwriting that kindergarten teachers had. Every stroke straight, every tail added. For a second it scared me, it was too superficial, too _perfect._ As if life was perfect. It was not. I would know. You would know. Even a seven year old would know.  
I nearly laughed, I was freaking out about handwriting. It occurred to me that I could still laugh another point towards becoming the ultimate beast of no feeling. Although when I laughed, it wasn't with feeling, it had no meaning. I just laughed because it seemed right, something I had been doing all my life. Maybe it was only half a point.  
One thing I had inherited from my vampire father was my ability to run. Fast. Nobody knew that, I pretended I was slower than even Esme. I realised I never called Carlisle or Esme, grandma or grandpa, but I called Charlie grandpa. Well only to his face, I wasn't allowed to call him Charlie. I remembered my mother talking about how wasn't allowed to call him Charlie to his face either. I guess it was because Carlisle or Esme had never felt like grandparents.  
Back to running. I bet I ran faster than mom or Jacob. Maybe even dad. Anyway, I guess part of running fast means your body works faster. So my eyes and ears take in stuff quickly. Like this room because only three seconds or so had past. I felt more vampire than human.  
Standing, blocking the exit to the left corridor (and conveniently my way to get to David) was a very smug Jane.

"Great," I muttered

"Hello Renesmee," she sneered, "Having a nice day?"

"Until you came, it was actually starting to look okay,"

The smile vanished off her face and she pouted.

"I've come to check up on you," she said coldly

"You saw me, like, three hours ago,"

"So?"

It occurred to me that she wasn't acting on Aro's or Calix's orders. She would have been flanked by some built bodyguard.

"What to do you want Jane?" I asked bored, wanting to skip over exchanging witty comments until we got to the point.

A scorching pain sent me across the room, banging against the right wall of the room. A new rush of pain surrounded my back and head. The burning sensation didn't leave until Jane had crossed the room to stand over me. It was an intimidating sight, but would be broken if I stood up.

"Do not even think of trying to win him over," she spat out

"Win who?" the spinning of my head made me wonder if I had missed something.

"Don't play stupid Cullen," the flames rushed through my body again.

I gritted my teeth. I was stronger than anyone knew too.

"I honestly don't know what the hell your on about," I struggled to say, and the fire grew.

"CALIX!" she screeched and the pain suddenly dropped away as she palmed to faced.

"What?" I giggled slightly, "Calix? Please I like him as much as spinach,"

She said nothing but her eyebrows screwed together.

"I hate spinach, it makes me throw up," I added, in case for some reason she thought spinach was appealing, "Especially boiled spinach,"

"Are you telling me that Calix is boiled spinach?" she replied apathetic

"Yep,"

Jane removed her hand from her forehead and opened her eyes. I suddenly wondered where all the care workers were and why I couldn't hear children.

"I'm watching you," she said threatening and snapped open a black cell phone, "Now."

"Who's that?" I asked, as it was something to do

Jane, of course, ignored me and the glass door opened half a second later. An elongated woman stepped in, her long blonde hair framing her face. Obviously, she was a vampire. Surprise flickered on her face as she saw me. I waved. Her eyes widened.

"Why isn't she still?" the woman said in a low alto voice

"She's not human," Jane replied impatiently

"Actually I'm half human, half vampire," I intervened flashing a fake smile.

The blonde looked more confused so I said nothing.

"Just go," Jane said

Blonde-haired woman frowned and suddenly I heard the noises I expected to hear. Banging, talking, laughing and footsteps coming this way. Jane quickly strode out of the door followed by blonde. A round woman come out from the right corridor and slid around to the other side of the counter.

"Sorry for the wait," she smiled, tired

"Hi I'm new here, so I don't quite know what to do,"

"Oh," she said her eyebrows raised, "What's the child's name that you wish to enrol,"

I realised she thought I was a mother, coming to enrol my child. No wonder she looked a little shocked. I couldn't pass for over twenty.

"No, no, no. He already goes here, I'm just new to picking him up," I explained

"Oh, I see. Well you do you have a pass?"

I nodded and handed her the plastic card. She looked at it and then pushed a clipboard in my direction.

"Every time you come here, you need to sign in this book. Then you go to the room and pick him up, taking the backpack and putting the water bottle from the shelf inside,"

"Okay," I said, and opened the clipboard.

Inside were sheets of typed up paper, tables with five columns on them. The lady showed me the group that David was in and his name. There was a column for the name, a sign in time, signature, sign out time and signature. I glanced around for a clock to write the time and found one opposite me. I quickly signed and closed the clipboard.

"Are you the sister?" the lady asked

"No. I'm the babysitter," I figured that explained it well enough

"Oh ok,"

"Thank you," I said and walked down the left corridor and opened the door to the room Gabby had indicated.

While the lady had been talking and I listening, the other half of my brain was figuring out what had just happened with Jane. Then is came to me, the blonde could stop time. It came to me in a wave; you could see it coming but wouldn't know the end result until it was over.  
I found the pegs where the backpacks were and found the green nametag with the words David James. Then, pretending I knew what I was doing, walked over to a shelf with different coloured bottles. I found an identical green nametag and grabbed the soccer ball print water bottle. I was then lost at what to do. Giving up, I found a care worker, with the tag of Jennifer.

"Uh, I'm new to babysitting for this kid, and I kind of don't know what he looks like," I said, with a winning smile

"Oh, you must be Renesmee Taylor," she replied

I nodded, surprised at the different surname, but didn't say anything.

"David!" she suddenly yelled very loudly then said, softer to me, "We just got the call an hour ago that you'd be coming instead."

A small black haired child trotted up to us. He looked thin, all bones and little fat, except for the slight stomach, that all babies and young children had. The thing that struck me most was his ice blue eyes. Piercing ice blue eyes, that had the capacity to look innocent all the time. I instantly liked him. And his jumper that read cute but psycho.

"David, this is Renesmee. She is going to take you home," Jennifer said, in a patronizing tone

"Hey," I said and smiled again.

I watched his lower lip wobble, and his eyes fill up. Oh dear, I just made a little kid cry.

"You hurt my eyes," he wailed and fell to the floor, sobbing.

And the same kid just called me ugly.

"Thanks," I told him and pouted

David laughed, his tantrum vanished, "You're funny."

"Tell me about it," I held out his backpack to him, "Do you want to carry it?"

"Yes please," Well, at least he had manners.

I bent down and helped him slide it onto his back. David grinned up at me and, to my surprise, grabbed my hand.

"Ready to go?" I asked, pretending not to notice his tiny hand around mine.

"Yep,"

"So I'm Renesmee," I told him, as we made our way to the door.

"I'm David. Are you going to be a our mom?"

Shocked at his assumption, it took a tweleve seconds to answer, "No, I'm going to be your new babysitter. Not your mom."

"Oh, ok,"

"You can call me Nessie for short," my name was a bit of a mouthful.

"Nessie. Like Loch Ness Monster," David said

I laughed, it was exactly the same connection my mother had made a while ago.

"Not quite, but you can think of it like that,"

"You're not scary at all. You're just really pretty. Monsters aren't pretty, they're green and slimy with six hundred eyes,"

I smiled and wondered if when he said you hurt my eyes, if I had made the wrong assumption. I never thought myself as pretty, beautiful or merely attractive. When people told me that I just assumed it was because they were family. But to have a child say that, was a bit of a news flash. I knew children, as young as three, didn't lie.

We walked to the door and I pushed it open with one hand, the other still clutching onto David.

"Bye now," the receptionist called as I opened the glass door at the front.

It only hit me as I pulled David out into the chilly air, that there might be vampires still lurking about. Quickly I whipped my head around, and smelt the air. Nope, no more vamps. Their scent was old. It then started to rain and naturally, I didn't have an umbrella. I scooped David up into my arms and ran to the car. Gabby hopped out with an umbrella as it started to bucket down, and opened the car door for me to put David in his booster seat. He was insistent of doing his own buckle so I checked it quickly after he was done.

"How about I drive back, so I can see if I can remember the way, for tomorrow," I offered, because I was a little worried about Gabby and her driving on wet, busy roads.

"Sure,"

I followed her to the passenger seat, so she could get in without getting wet. I then walked back around to the driver's side and hopped in, chucking the wet umbrella in the middle seats, next to David.  
I turned the key in the ignition and the car started up quietly. I could tell it was quite powerful, as when I pressed down the pedal, gently (as I had learnt from driving extremely fast cars) it jumped forward about a foot. Well maybe not that much. Working on my acting skills, I occasionally asked Gabby for directions and hesitated at a few crossings.

We arrived at the house at five thirty eight, due to traffic jams on the highway. David unbuckled his seat by himself, a feat that in which he was very pleased with himself. I fumbled slightly with the key to the front door. To be honest, I think I was nervous. I had never cooked a proper meal, let alone for more than two. My cooking skills started and ended with toast, bacon and eggs. Oh, and the occasional smoothie/milkshake, which once had resulted with the contents all over the kitchen, Jacob, myself and my father, who had happened to step through the door, when I flicked the switch without the lid on the blender. Now I was faced with the challenge of cooking dinner. And meeting a sixteen-year-old boy, who I was playing 'mother' to. Great.  
I managed to turn the handle on the door and stepped into the front hall, a Spiderman backpack hanging off one arm and a dripping umbrella on the other. David was holding Gabby's hand this time, and he pushed past me, with her in tow, to the main room.

"Hey mate," a voice called and I wasn't sure if it had just broken, or if it was naturally deep.

"Guess what, guess what!" David yelled excitedly.

At least they got on; I couldn't handle a sibling fight. I was generally the one in them, not breaking them up.

"What?"

"We have a new babysitter. Her name's Renesmee but she likes to be called Nessie, not like the Loch Ness Monster because she's not a monster. She's really pretty and nice,"

"Huh? Dude, we don't need one," the boy (I still didn't know his name) said, dumbfounded.

I decided this was the cue to step into the room. Feeling slightly floaticious (floating like) I walked in and found, a tall and muscular, blonde boy sitting on the counter top, mobile phone in hand, pulling away from ruffling his sisters hair with the other. Gabby didn't look too happy.

"Uh, hi," I said and dropped the backpack into the corner

Silence, liked to come at the awkward times.

"Hello," he managed to say, eyes wide.

"Well, I'm going to, um, put the umbrella outside so it can, uh, dry," I was never good at awkward silences.

I tended to stutter and babble on, when meeting people, yet somehow they were still drawn to me. It was rather confusing. I walked to a sliding door, near the dining table, and pulled at the handle. Nothing happened. Jeez, all I wanted was to dump the umbrella under the porch and the door had to rust. It then occurred to me, that the door wasn't near any rain exposure. I flicked the lock on the handle and tried again, with no change. I pouted, at which Gabby sighed and David giggled. Miss Entertainment is awarded to Renesmee Cullen, again.

"Uh, how do you open it?" I asked, sheepish.

"The bolt at the top," said Gabby, rolling her eyes.

"Right," I quickly found the bolt and reached up on my toes, but I still couldn't reach. I hated being small.

"Can I have some help?" I was mortified, over not being able to open a door. Pathetic.

The boy ran his hand through his hair, causing it to stick up. Like waves going in different directions. He slid off the counter and walked over to me, bringing aftershave with him. With one lift of his arm, he pulled the bolt, with a click.

"It won't work if you're short," he said, trying to make a joke.

"I'm not short, just below average," I retorted

He just laughed and pulled a chair out from the table, sat down and started to text. The door slid open easily, I stepped out into the cold air, propped the umbrella in a corner and walked back inside. I relatched the doors, closing the curtains. The rain was depressing and reminded me of home, which reminded me of that beast, that happened to be me, that didn't give about who I'd left behind. I flicked the lights on, with a panel on the sidewall.  
Now to cook.

* * *

_Get ready for some Cullen and La Push, next chapter._


	6. Chapter 5: Blackmail and Tomato Puree

_Ok so this is going to be confusing. You see, I'm switching between years, depending on who's point of view it is. The reason is because I didn't want to put in months of pain etc. from Jacob but I did want to show how Renesmee develops over the year. So I'm putting years up next to the month. The year 2013 is what I've currently been in, so 2014 is the next year, obviously.  
__I'm updating a little early because I wrote this chapter quickly, don't you just love holidays?  
__Have fun._

Previously

I flicked the lights on, with a panel on the sidewall.

Now to cook.

* * *

Chapter Five

**July 2014**

Jacob's POV

Isn't funny that when you think stuff is just starting to make sense, that it all changes and you're left with even less understanding than before?It's not funny. It's a fucking shithole that you're left behind in.  
You know how people say black holes are when God divides by zero? Well God has gone and divided my life by zero.  
I remember times when I couldn't breathe, just couldn't understand how the sun could rise in the morning. I remember times when I blocked out everything that reminded me of _her._ I burnt clothes, CDs, trees, furniture, anything that had her scent all over it. The one thing that I kept was pictures. I couldn't bear to cut her out of my life completely. Back then, I told myself that I wanted something to scream at, when it got too much. Now I know that I did it because I didn't want to lose the only thing I'd known to call mine. Something that couldn't be taken by customers, repo men or sickness.  
So know I sit here, all day and most of the night, and look at pictures. At first, it hurt so much that I could only look at a few. Now, I've gotten used to it, and can look through hundreds (and there were hundreds because Alice and Blondie liked to extend her childhood as much as possible through pictures) and smile and remember what it used to be like.  
I came across one box, that wasn't the Cullens (Edward had given me most of theirs, I just had to ask when I wanted more. I guess he wasn't _that_ bad, he missed her too. Maybe the parasite had a heart after all, it just didn't beat.) but the packs', pictures that were most recent. I cringed a little, when I went through some that were of her and Luke, but I'd gotten over the jealously (fine, I admit I was a jealous.), he had Ingrid. The one that really stopped me was the picture at the very end.

_Her cheeks we even rosier with excitement, her lips pulled back into a laugh, white and straight teeth flashing in the summer sun. She sat upon a huge russet wolf, like she was bareback on a horse. Cream skinned hands clutched at the fur as the wolf looked back at her with a grin._

I started to shake, tremors, uncontrollable. I pushed, the photos aside, in case I phased and destroyed them. Taking deep breaths, I finally controlled myself.  
It was July, I had already missed one birthday, I wasn't going to miss another.  
I was going to get her back. Because she was _mine._

Renesmee's POV

**July, 2013.**

Tomato puree was splashed across the stove stop, flour all over the counter top, dough stuck on the pasta machine. I had just made my first dinner dish, spaghetti bolognaise. Unfortunately, it seemed that Italy didn't see the need to buy pasta, but make it instead. And that was very difficult. I refused to have any help from Gabby or Samantha. Well I didn't know what his actual name was. He said it was Sam and Gabby said it was Panther, so I settle for a mix of both. I think it was Sam because I 'd never heard of Panther as a name before, but maybe it was Italian. I debated whether to spell it Samanther but maybe Panther as a name (if it was a name) was spelt Pantha. So I left it with the traditional spelling of Samantha. I was happy to be eating by seven o'clock, although George wasn't home in time. It was quite a feat for me. He only turned up at twelve past nine. He'd come home to a bowl of spaghetti waiting in the microwave to be warmed up, a clean house, David in bed, Samantha doing his homework and Gabby at work. Apparently (I was only told afterwards) that David was supposed to be in bed by half past seven. I'd started cooking at six o'clock, so I'd only got him into the bath (I was grateful he could wash himself) at seven o'clock. I guessed half an hour past his bedtime was sufficient. I then scrubbed the kitchen (literally, I would need to avoid making dough; it stuck on to granite and refused to come off) swept the floors and figured out the dishwasher. By then (eight forty seven, I was a fast cleaner) Gabby left the house for her shift at a restaurant near the local supermarket, about ten minutes away. She told me she would be back by ten, as she was only filling in for someone and to make sure Samantha (or brother, as she called him) did his homework. Everything had been sorted and I was reading a book, the heater burning the supply of wood slowly. I was glad that I'd learnt Italian before coming here, one summer where it was raining and I had nothing better to do. It was good because I could avoid the bad English from shop owners and take a trip to the library that I had seen on the way to the day care, to get some books. I had inherited my love of books from my mother. Dad hated the classics (something about how they weren't old to him) and any other book written millions of years ago but also didn't like the 'modern' books. Therefore he was left to dislike books. I could read the same one over and over again, it didn't bother me.

"You're a legend," George had told me when I was nuking the food for him to eat.

"It's no problem, it was easy really," no need to tell him of my lack of cooking skills.

I read until everyone started getting ready for bed. I placed the book back in the bookcase in the lounge and walked down the back hall. Gabby had shown me where each rooms were when I'd gone to put David in the bath. It was not a long hallway with rooms coming off it, as I had assumed. There was a smaller passage on the right, where the three children's room were, Gabby and Samantha's opposite each other and David in between. The bathroom that David and Samantha shared was on the left side of the longer passage. The master bedroom, guest bedroom (my room) and Gabby's room had their own bathrooms attached. I guess the boys didn't spend as much time in the bathroom as Gabby and I. Next to the shared bathroom was the master bedroom and then at the very end (isolated from the other rooms) was the guest room. There were a few cupboards in the longer passageway with linen and towels and another room opposite the master bedroom, which must have been the laundry. I headed into the guest bedroom, the first time I had been in there.  
The walls and carpet were cream, a double bed sitting in the centre, with floral covers and an ornate metal bed frame. The other furniture was mahogany (it seemed popular in the décor), a bedside table to the right of the bed. A long rectangular window with white, floor length curtains was in the left corner, a desk under it, with a vase of tulips on them and a desk lamp. I walked over and opened the drawers, finding stationary in both of them. A white double door cupboard took up the rest of the left wall. It was huge. I opened it and found a chest of drawers in side full of underwear and pyjamas. Above that was a shelf of neatly folded t-shirts and shorts. A clothes rack was on either side of the drawers, on the left in long Ziploc type of bags (like what you got clothes in when you got them back from the drycleaners), were pants and on the right were dresses. Above the shelf was another clothes rack that stretched right across, in the same drycleaner bags were skirts, jumpers, sweaters, coats, anoraks. On a shelf below the bottom racks, were heaps of shoes, in three rows. Alice would have loved this place, the Volturi went overboard. I closed the doors quickly (designer clothes scared me a little) and checked out the rest of the room. Up against the right wall, was a dressing table, like you got in movie stars dressing rooms, complete with drawers of makeup and a mirror. In the right corner was another door, leading to the bathroom which I opened and ventured further. It was a lot like the one back in the Volturi tower, marbled but smaller. The bathtub still had spa facilities and the shower looked like it was more suitable for one or two, rather than ten. The counter was small too, with three cupboards down the middle. Inside them were toothpaste and toothbrushes, a hairbrush, shampoo, conditioner, soap and other hygiene stuff along with more beauty products. I walked back into the bedroom and to the cupboards, checking that the bedroom door was locked. I opened the drawer in the cupboard, and rifled through the stacks of matching pyjamas until I found a set I liked. It was a light blue, long sleeved cotton shirt with flannel grey pants with white spots. It didn't look too designer like but more Wal-Mart. I showered and got ready for bed. There was a basket to put laundry in, but I decided to check out the laundry quickly, so I could get familiar with it. I opened the door silently and switched the light on. It was your normal laundry, with a washing machine and dryer. I was grateful they didn't use washing lines in Italy. I headed back to my room and just as I was about to sink into the soft mattress, I remembered I had left the heater in the lounge on. Not wanting to cause a fire, I crept out of my room, careful not to wake anyone. I was also grateful that Jake had a wood heater at his house too, so I knew how to light it and unlight it. As soon as the fire went out, the room was blanketed in coldness and darkness but luckily, with my supersonic eyes I could see well enough to make it back to my room. I wasn't often cold either which meant I didn't get goosebumps that easily. Not from the cold, at least.  
I've never believed in 'I feel asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow' in books, but I do now.

Jacob's POV

**July, 2014**

Edward, of course, new my exact purpose of going to the mansion and had told the others. This was good, I didn't want to waste time explaining everything, I wanted to leave _now._

"We can't leave straight away," Edward said, catching my last thought.

"There are many things that need to be planned. We can't just jump into attacking, there is too many to possibly fight. We need cunning, something to hold against them," Carlisle, the reasoner, spoke.

"Blackmail the Volturi?" I laughed without humour.

"That's why we need to plan. Look through their history, any loose thread in their reputation," Edward continued

"But that could take months or years! What are they, a trillion years old?!" the overdramatic award goes to Jacob.

That thought stopped me. It was something _she_ would do, make up awards and give them to herself. It was a habit that I'd picked up. That also made my need to see her, even stronger.

"Jacob, you need to know that there might not be a possibility," Bella said quietly, leaving Edward's side and coming to place a hand on my arm.

"You want me to leave her there?" I choked out, shoving my arm away from her ice cold hand.

"We're not saying there isn't one. But just in case-"

"-Just in case, don't get your hopes up. Yeah, I get it," I cut in, bitterly.

"She might be happy there," Bella, told me, obviously trying to make it better.

It made it worse. How could she possibly be happy there, with leeches and their red eyes? I knew she would hate it; I doubted they let her run free and she hated being confined.

"If you don't get one, Edward, I swear I'm going there alone and getting her. So help me, I'll go alone," I yelled and the tremors broke out. I was actually speaking to all of them but Edwards was the first name that came out.

I ran through the house and into the forest, leaving a trail of clothing behind me. On all fours I ran until I felt others phasing. Stupid bloodsuckers must have told them. I stopped and howled miserably to the empty sky.

That was the day I started saying her name again.

* * *

_Sorry if the switching between months was a bit confusing. Round one votes for Indie Twific Awards start 9__th July 2009 at noon. He he.  
__More on the Cullens either next chapter or the one after that._

* * *


	7. Chapter 6: Unwanted Clocks

_Updated nice and early for you because I broke my leg and was stuck at home all week. It just happens to be school break, doesnt it?_

_Skipping a bit of time to the month of August. Remember about the years, that I'm still writing Renesmee in 2013 but Jacob in 2014._

* * *

Chapter Six

Renesmee's POV

**August 2013**

I groaned as my body told me it was time to get up. It was something I had been working on. I remember reading about it in this book, the character would picture a clock in her mind set to the time she wanted to wake up. Then she would push it to the back of her mind and miraculously she would wake up on time. I had no idea if it would even work, as it was a fiction novel, but after two months, it did. Caution: don't try this unless you have a backup plan or a near vampire brain.

Sighing, I pushed back the comforter and crawled to the right side of the bed. I tended to splay myself across the mattress while I was sleeping. I sometimes envy the people who can just dangle a foot of the side and hit the floor. It sucks having to use your muscles as soon as you wake up, in a movement you haven't used in while. For me, I'd never used. I think I just skipped over stuff like crawling because I already knew what to do and couldn't be bothered tying them out in real life. I remember never stopping to try, always knowing what to do. It stopped when I was physically about thirteen or fourteen because, even though I already had the mind of an adult, my hormones kicked in and I wanted to fit in. Like every teenager wants, even those who said they couldn't care less. They do crazy stuff to get attention. It was the same thing as fitting in, you needed attention to do that. I wanted to be _normal_, a feat not possible when you're actually three, have vampire biological parents and a werewolf for a best friend. Somehow, I managed, not even as a loner but with actual friends. Sometimes I felt like I was faking and when I asked myself who I really was, I couldn't answer. I didn't know what my capabilities or limits where. Then it hit me that I was normal, exactly what I wanted, nothing special or amazing about me. Jacob would usually find me crying and come to comfort me. But Jacob wasn't here, so there was no use thinking about what I wanted compared to what I was. No one was going to come and tell me everything was okay.

I crossed over to the wardrobe, not bothering to look in the mirror on my dresser. I would look awful; I had only slept for about three hours last night. Even I, the hybrid, needed more than three hours sleep. My dreams had been plagued with russet wolves slumping to the floor and pools of bright red seeping from underneath. A girl with bronze curls just stared and started to laugh and laugh until she was on the floor, the tears streaming down her cheeks, clutching her stomach. Eventually I would see her face and it was me, all the time. It was one of those nightmares that felt like forever but only lasted a few minutes. Most people would wake up and think of course that couldn't go on forever, it would have to stop sometime. You can't dream when you're dead. But the scary thing for me was that it could go on forever, if you lived forever. Which I just happened to.

I glanced out the window, something I liked to keep open and saw, as usual, cloudy skies. It was the middle of summer, but this place was just like Forks, raining when it was supposed to be shining. I grabbed a pair of pants and a blouse and on my way to the bathroom, I was glad to see they matched when I took a second look. I remember having a drought once (of course, we weren't in Forks) and I threw a tantrum about not having a shower in the morning and at night. I had to choose. I needed both, one to feel awake and one to feel clean. We moved towns after that, to one where there was no drought. Mom, dad, and Jacob said it was because we'd stayed there too long, and I had grown too much to avoid attention. I still doubt whether it was because they just wanted me to have what I wanted. God, did I demand everything? Was I some snob, who got what she wanted?

The hot spray of the shower pulled me out of my reverie and I focused on every drop of water to stop my mind from wondering. Once I had showered, I decided not to put it off any longer and look in the mirror. I wasn't surprised at the purple bruise like bags under the bloodshot eyes. My hair was also matted but I had combed it out. You see, I hadn't been sleeping since I had come here. Not wanting to be fussed over about nightmares (in which I woke up drenched in sweat, silently screaming) and not being able to put down my appearance to bed night's sleep all the time, I had taken to wearing make-up. If you'd known me before, that was a very abnormal thing to do. I had been raised to cringe at the sight of make-up and with an aunt like Alice it was impossible not to. I now knew the names of the very best brands and very dodgy ones, and which ones to buy in bulk when on sale and ones that wouldn't have a long shelf life.

I applied the anti-bags cream (which I doubted to work but used anyway) and powdered my face with foundation and blush. I painted my eyelashes with mascara and drew a light line of eyeliner. I finished it off with some natural coloured lipstick. Alice would be proud; I had put it on exactly the way she had taught me. I pulled my hair off my face into a bun and fixed up the bathroom. Heading back into my room I made the bed, dumped my washing in the basket and poured more water into the vase of flowers, which was now consistent in my room. I found a pair of heels (it seemed the only thing the Volturi offered for footwear), grabbed the purse I was using for this week (I liked to rotate them) left my room, clicking down the hallway into the main room. David was already awake and watching his older siblings eating breakfast. He jumped up excitedly when he saw me.

"Nessie!" he said running up to me and hugging me around my legs.

I smiled and gave him a hug in return.

"Rise and shine beautiful," Sam said, the usual comments he said and I ignored.

They thought (being his friends, sister and himself) I was oblivious to the fact that there was some meaning behind the words. I was used to people at my high school, telling me I was pretty and I knew people flocked to me by some unknown force I had. So, it didn't stop me in my tracks every time a wolf whistle headed my way or some comment was shouted out. Sometimes I wondered if they thought they'd get some easy because I looked vulnerable. I could shred them to pieces.

I glanced at the clock, alarmed that I must have wasted so much time getting ready; it was already eight o'clock. I had to get David at childcare in fifteen minutes. Which meant breakfast on the go, as my day was already jam-packed. I had quickly gotten into a pattern and wherever I had free time I made sure, there was something else to do. I didn't want to have time to dwell on the past during the day, there was plenty of time for that at night.

David liked to dress himself, which meant picking his own clothes. I thanked God today wasn't one of the days where he choose something completely un matching.

"Ok sport, grab your backpack and it's time to go," I told him and then turned to Gabby and Samantha, "And you two are going to be late if you don't get moving."

"Yes _mother,"_ Gabby muttered and disappeared into her room.

I grabbed an apple from the fruit bowl and bottled water from the refrigerator. David came out of his room, struggling to put on his backpack. I quickly helped him pull the straps onto his arms.

"Bye Samantha and tell your sister that she needs to call me if her father can't take her to the mall," I called from the front hall, where I was grabbing the set of keys from the bowl.

"Ok," I heard him say between mouthfuls of toast, "Don't see why she needs to go some place special for one prom."

I laughed and continued to search frantically for the keys again. I remembered they were in my bag five seconds later and pulled them out. Opening the front door, I motioned for David to come quickly. I buckled him in record human time and flew in to the driver's seat. Ten minuted to go. I would need a miracle to get there and back in time for walking Mrs Next Door's (I actually didn't know her name yet)Labrador. I heard David's stomach complain, when I was on the main road.

"You've had breakfast right?" I prayed very hard that the answer was some form of yes.

"Uh-huh, but I'm still hungry,"

I sighed and forfeited my apple.

**August 2014**

Jacob POV's

It took them a month to gather the complete works of Volterra history. It reminded me of the Complete Works of Shakespeare that we had on our bookcase back home in La Push. Heavy, confusing and seemingly worthless. Now I understood just how important the history was because it was going to save my girl. I made a mental note to check out that Shakespeare guy, maybe it was worth reading. I can't believe I just said that. I can guarantee that I won't be reading Shakespeare in a hurry. Academics aren't the main components of my life. After gathering all the important events (or extremely boring records of who killed whom) the next step was to read the bloody thing. That would take a lot longer and I'd given myself a deadline of September 10. Which just happened to be Nessie's birthday. One good thing was that the vamps didn't need to sleep, and if I'd had my way we would've read without stopping ,ever. I could afford to lose a month of sleep; it was for a good cause. A very good cause. But of course I didn't get my way because that stupid nurturing Esme wanted us to take breaks. No way in hell was I going to take a break, but they could if they wanted, I mean, I didn't want them to miss anything with their carelessness from boredom. If vampires ever got bored.

I realised that I couldn't be of much use when they weren't there because we were only up to the early fourteen hundreds. I could barely understand the English beside a few thous and thees. That was just the English, there were tons of scripts in weird looking languages that reminded me of a word jumble and spaghetti. So, I stopped when they did, which wasn't often; only for half an hour, broken up throughout the day. When I did take a break, I would find myself walking through the woods, going over memories. Memories that were broken because I'd crushed them when Nessie had first left. I hated myself for doing that because now I had nothing to think of clearly, when I wanted to remember her. It just made my anticipation strengthen which pushed me further to find something to kill (or mentally harm) those fucking Volturi vampires. This made me snap at everyone but I honestly didn't care, it was their kinds fault that my Ness was gone. I couldn't be that angry with Bella, besides being my best friend, without her there wouldn't be no Nessie. I suppose Edward had something to do with it.

It was during my little walks down memory lane that I found it. It was the clearing where they had taken her away; fucking dragged her as if she was some rag doll. She was much prettier and kinder than a rag doll. The clearing was somewhere I had tended to avoid, because the pain was the strongest there. The reason I had even attempted to go in there was that I had this feeling that we were getting closer to finding something to blackmail those little fuckers with. Emmett had found a mention of some guy called Marcus who had some love interest called Didyme. The strange thing was that none of the Cullens (not even Carlisle who had lived with like a million years ago for a million years) had ever heard of her. I was hoping for something along the lines of the girl sucking the blood of all humans in a hundred mile radius and the Volturi bribing the public of Volterra with money, to shut up. Something like that.

While thinking of more possibilities involving the couple holding up banks and biting arteries of kings and queens, my foot found something other than dirt. It was an abnormal shaped lump, nothing like a stick or a leaf. Curious, I bent down and scooped it up, it looked like a necklace or something. I blew on it, causing the dust to fly into my eyes. It stung for a second and I blinked it out, but the pain had already gone away. It was gold, round with a rim carved around the outside. With shaking hands, I opened the clasp, hoping that it wasn't what I thought it was. Sure enough, there was plus que ma propre vie, more than my own life. My eyes flicked to the place where the picture of Nessie, Edward and Bella was. Well, used to be. Instead, there was a piece of lined paper, folded so that it seemed to pop out of the locket. In the familiar cursive of Nessie, were the words I'm sorry. Not missing a beat, I crawled, following the same line that the locket had been. I saw another bump in the ground, and not waiting to let myself pause, I grabbed at it. As I had expected, it was a blue and white braided bracelet. There was no sorry note with it.

I let the emotions overtake me. I crumpled to the floor, my mind whirling.

What did this mean?

Did it mean she didn't want us? She didn't want to risk our lives, so she left them behind because she couldn't or wouldn't want to remember? Did she have no faith the she would ever get out?

Or maybe, a small voice (the evil voice that convinced me to drink a whole bottle of wine when I was eight) in the back of my head said, she didn't want you. Nessie never loved you and she was just playing along. Because she didn't want to hurt you. She never wanted you that way; you were her best friend for God's sake. It wasn't what she wanted.

And it had to be true. To her I was some twenty three year old who was in love with her. That was disturbing, even if I didn't technically age from sixteen. Nessie didn't even know that I had imprinted on her, which would have made the whole thing reasonable. She was probably happy to go. Why else would she have left the Quileute promise bracelet behind? As for the locket, maybe she thought she should just get rid of anything, to remove any ties to me.

I phased quickly, hoping to find someone on patrol. Fortunately and unfortunately, that person was Seth. Lucky someone was there and unluckily it happened to be the one who asked too many questions, never shutting up.

_Hey Jake _Seth said, bouncy as ever.

_Seth _I greeted wearily.

_You sure sound happy._

_Just be grateful I acknowledged you._

_Don't worry, we live to have you even think of us _Leah snorted, trotting into the area Seth was.

_When did you get here? _I asked, annoyed and slightly shocked.

_Yesterday. It is Emily's birthday next week._

_Right. Well I just need the time. _I was trying desperately to hide what I had just found out.

_It's one in the morning_. Leah replied, _I came to tell Seth to go to bed, Embry's going on patrol._

I didn't bother to say goodbye and phased back into human form. The pack had kept quiet about the whole bloodsuckers steal imprint, after I lashed out at them when they tried to be 'comforting. That was a good idea.

First thing in the morning, I would tell Edward to stop the search. She didn't want us.

* * *

_This is going to be long, like my normal author notes that extend for pages. Ok, I just wanted to say that Jacob got it wrong about why Renesmee left the locket and bracelet behind. But I'm not going to say why she actually did, that comes later. Oh and about the bracelet, I don't know how Stephenie Meyer pictured it and I couldn't find any websites that would provide factual stuff, so I just choose some colors. I choose blue because it symbolizes faith, loyalty and trust and white represents protection and healing which is stuff you want in a promise, right? That stuff about Marcus and Didyme is true, which I can prove if you read to the very end of Breaking Dawn. For those of you who wanted perspective from someone like Bella or Edward, I'm sorry but I'm sticking with Renesmee and Jacob because well, this is a Renesmee and Jacob story. Anyway, if anyone can guess how the Volturi are going to be blackmailed (I never said it was going to be by Jacob or the Cullens) say so. I admit it is a little early but some of those clever cookies (that's my new phrase obsession) or Twilight obsessed might be able to guess, but I wouldn't expect it just yet.  
__Surprisingly that wasn't even half a page._


	8. Chapter 7: A Musical of Strangers

_I know I usually upload once a week but (as you might have seen on my profile) this past week fanfiction has not let me upload anything onto my account. Whatever it was stopped today so here is chapter seven, finally. That was just for last week, but for the week before that, I had a bit of writers block for this chapter. I know a lot of you had many ideas of where this story would go after the last ending. But really, I just wrote stuff and that's what came out, I hadn't planned it or anything. I know how this story is going to end but the parts in between are a bit of a blur. No worries though, this chapter is finally done and I now have an idea of where I want to go for the next few chapters.  
Picking up from where the last chapter left off, in the month of August._

* * *

Chapter Seven

**August 2013**

Renesmee's POV

I made it back to the house without looking at the clock. I opened the door to the now empty house and dumped my handbag on the front table. Walking in to the main room, I pulled of my heels and padded into my own room. Here, I took a deep breath and looked at the clock. I sighed in relief, I had two minutes until I had to walk Mrs Next Door's dog. I didn't know the dogs name either. It seemed to respond to dog, so I didn't bother asking what it's actual name was. I quickly changed into jeans and pulled a pair of converse on before running at vampire speed to the door. I didn't bother to take anything, I would just use the spare key which was situated in the power box. The key to the power box was under the doormat, which was pretty clever. Not really, but most people looked under the mat when trying to break into houses or something. However, if they found the power box key they wouldn't get it to fit the front door lock. Not that I was too worried about burglars, if someone really wanted to break in, like desperately, they wouldn't be stopped by a front door. After standing for three minutes and twelve seconds and talking about the state of Mrs Next Door's flowers I took the dog. I usually took him to the main shopping complex and back, but yesterday I had found a park, so I decided to walk there. Luckily, the dog was very obedient, and didn't pull on the leash. Or, I didn't notice it with my extra strength. The park was small, one small playground and a few picnic benches, but the river was on the left side and I liked watching the waves against the shore. When I reached the park, I took the dog off the lead and let him run free. I thought a dog would run off without a second glance, but this one trotted next to me, not fazed by the fact that he could run wherever. I pang went through me as he reminded me of wolf Jacob, who did the same thing when we used to walk through the woods. I decided that maybe I wasn't a monster of no emotion but one who had free rain over what she thought of. We walked like this around the whole oval then back around the other way, so I could look at the water once more. I asked someone walking on the same path, what the time was. It was already eleven thirty and I had to rush back to Mrs Next Door's, in order to get on with the rest of my day. Back at the house, I cleaned the main room and bathrooms before going to fix my own room up. I didn't touch the master bedroom or Sam and Gabby's rooms, I left them some privacy. I did make David's bed and pick up his toys. I then made lunch and cleaned the kitchen. I did two loads of laundry, washing one while the other dried and then drying one while I folded the other. By two thirty, I was putting the laundry on the beds, or packing it away on David's and my case. I now moved back to the kitchen and made afternoon tea for David. He used to have it at the day care but now he got picked up earlier, since I could get there earlier. I jumped back into the car and picked him up at three thirty, stopping on the way back to pick up bread rolls. When we made it back, Sam and Gabby were already home. Gabby was in her room, supposedly doing homework. She was upset because her date had cancelled on her for the prom, which was only a week away. According to Sam, the boy was going on vacation early, and had 'forgotten' to tell Gabby. After greeting Samantha and his friend and putting out the platter of fruit for David, I knocked gingerly on her door.

"It's me, Nessie," I said pathetically.

She didn't answer so I just opened the door. I found her lying face down on her bed, iPod blaring out music on the dock. I sat on the edge of her bed for seven minutes before getting up and moving to her desk. I saw homework on her desk and sat down in the chair, picking up a sheet of paper.

"Ew, I hate geography," I said, scanning the sheet.

Gabby poked her head up, "Me too."

I smiled and went over to her. I hugged her the way my mom did when I was upset. The way she used to.

"I'm not going to say don't worry," I began, "Because it kinda sucks if you don't have a date for prom. Especially if it's your last one."

The school that Gabby and Samantha went to was different to the traditional Italian schooling system but not quite the same as the American system. School ended at the end of August and started again in October. They then had two weeks on Christmas and another three for Easter. Apart from vacations, the year grading was the same as in America. Gabby was at the end of her senior year and Sam would be a senior in the new school year.

"Tell me about it," Gabby muttered.

"Don't suppose you could take one of Sam's friends?"

Gabby laughed bitterly, "Are you kidding me? What kind of loser goes to prom with her _brother's_ friend?"

I sighed; she had a point. I couldn't think of anyone she could take besides someone at her school, although she insisted the whole male population in her grade was taken. I thought for a bit longer until I came up with one stupid idea.

"Want me to dress up as a man?" I asked weakly.

" You're too short. People would think you were gay anyway, you're too graceful."

"Whatever," I muttered, "I'm afraid your case is hopeless."

"Finally someone gets it," Gabby replied and she sat up and walked to her desk.

"Well I should make dinner or something. Just try not to commit suicide or anything."

"I won't," Gabby laughed and scribbled something down on the paper I had looked at before.

Satisfied that she would be slightly okay, I left her room. It was only five o'clock, a little early to start cooking, so I read a few books to David before I started. At six, I found Sam and his friend rummaging around in the cupboard. I was going to smack the back of his head but he was too tall. Instead, I crept up behind them.

"Take something and get out of the way," I whispered threateningly and laughed when they jumped.

Sam grinned down at me and grabbed a packet of crisps. Instead of going into his room, they sat at the counter chairs. I ignored them as I gathered ingredients for a beef stir-fry. I cooked everything from memory as this recipe was from Emily. I had everyone eating half an hour later, including Sam's friend, whose name turned out to be Fred. I giggled a little when I heard the name, I know that was mean, but it reminded me of a frog for some reason. Eventually I had David in bed, Fred at his own house, Gabby at work and Sam doing his homework. I also had the kitchen cleaned and George's food in the microwave ready to be heated up when he came home. I was dangerously close to thinking, so I picked a random book off the shelf and started to read. When George came home, I nuked his food and then did a final clean of the kitchen. It was around nine thirty when I got a phone call from Gabby.

"Hey Ness, can you come pick me up?"

"Why?" I asked confused- she had taken her own car.

"My car won't start and no mechanic is open,"

"Okay, I'll be there soon. Just stay inside, away from scary men, okay?"

Gabby laughed, "See you soon."

"Bye," I hung up and told George where I was going.

I took my purse of the table in the hall and drove quickly to the restaurant where she worked. I didn't want to get out of the car (because you had to pay for parking) so I rang her cell phone. It took a while for her to come out but she did finally, apologising for it when she hoped in. The drive back and the rest of the night were uneventful. I took a shower when we got home and then went to bed. In some sick sort of way, I looked forward to dreaming. At least then, I got to see his face.

**August 2014**

Jacob's POV

Why would no-one fucking listen to me? The chick obviously didn't want to be here, so why even bother? Yeah, because you love her. I must not have noticed. Sorry, for the inconvenience you fucking bloodsucker. If I pretend my life is a musical, will everything be more surreal, hence easier to cope with? Well, let me set the stage. A raining winter day, the soil black with dampness and the few cars driving around were spraying water everywhere. The- lights- turned- on- throughout- the- whole- house kind of day. A character called Jacob Black is seated upon a white leather sofa armrest, hands curled into fists. A goddam ugly person called Edward Cullen is opposite in a matching armchair, the supposed love of his life to the left facing a window. A pixie named Alice Cullen is on a staircase with another character called Jasper Hale. A blonde chick that goes by Rosalie Hale is out sucking the blood of your dog and her partner Emmett Cullen is wondering around with her. The first song begins, entitled 'There is Seriously Something Wrong with this Picture'. Character Edward Cullen begins, on solo.

"_Jacob, you might have gotten this wrong. What if she left it there for another reason?"_

Enter Alice Cullen and Jasper Hale.

"_I just can't see anything!" _AC sings, throwing her hands into the air.

"_Stop feeling so hopeless. There's nothing you can do."_ JH intervenes in a comforting manner.

"_Exactly! Nothing we can do. She doesn't want help, Cullen." _Jacob Black cuts in, with persuading hand gestures.

English, or music, was never my thing. So, to cut a long story short (one that lasted fifteen minutes) the hand gestures didn't work. Resolution: Jacob Black smashes a few vases, steals the contents of the refrigerator and storms back to La Push. For once, he didn't want to phase, to let instincts take over feelings. They were the only things keeping him going.

**August 2013**

Renesmee's POV

"It's no problem, really," I said for the hundredth time, to a boy no older than eighteen.

Apparently picking up a few coins off the floor at a parking meter, was considered the heroic deed of the century. It isn't, which was the point I was trying to get across to this person. He wasn't the brightest.

"Please, keep the coins," he insisted.

"Look, you're making me late with all your crap. I honestly don't want your money!" I snapped and yanked my ticket out of the slot.

I walked quickly to my car, opening the door and sliding the ticket on the dashboard. I prayed that he wasn't behind me and climbed back over the passenger seat. I hit the lock button on the remote, with a strange sense of satisfaction when I heard the locks click. I clicked across the flagstones in my heels, to the front entrance. I then registered the throaty chuckles behind me. I decided not to look, in case of the unexpected and continued walking.

"What's your name?" a man called out.

I turned around to find the same guy with the coins waiting for my reply. I sighed.

"It's Renesmee,"

"That's a mouthful," he replied and I suddenly found myself right in front of him.

"Yeah, it is. Most people call me Nessie,"

"Like the loch ness monster," he mused.

I laughed, "I guess so."

"So, you're American right?"

"No kidding," I said earning another throaty chuckle.

"Are you overly busy after your appointment, Nessie?"

I didn't know why I was even talking to this guy. I didn't care that I was about five minutes late. All I could do was to stare into his eyes when he said my name. What the fuck.

"I, uh, have to, I mean after, um, this meeting," I stuttered ,for the very first time in my life, then said simply, "No."

The guy grinned, "I'll wait for you."

I nodded, as if in a trance. Without saying goodbye, I whirled around and hurried up marbled steps.

As I walked quickly down a corridor of black and white tiles and blue walls, I tried to convince myself that the reason that I had agreed to go anywhere with a guy (whose name I didn't know), had nothing to do with the fact that he reminded of me someone I'd left behind.

* * *

_And that's it. Sorry again about the late update. Have a great week!_


	9. Chapter 8: The Thought Needs to Crash

_So it's been another fortnight since I updated. Well, I'd like to say I had a good reason but I don't. My leg is still broken so it's not like I've been out much.  
__Anyway._

* * *

Chapter Eight

**August 2013**

Renesmee's POV

I swallowed loudly before approaching the reception desk. I had no idea why I was here and was still in a dazed shock after the encounter with date guy.  
The reception area was, like the rest of the décor, marble. The woman behind it sat upright typing away at a white keyboard. She looked sour; a pinched mouth, long nose and jaw with black hair pulled back tight into a bun. She reminded me of a stereotypical librarian.  
There was no line and despite the fact she was right there, I waited four minutes thirty. I decided to ring a little gold bell to gain her attention. If possible, she pursed her lips further.

"Hi, um, my name is Renesmee. I got a call telling me to come here for a meeting," I told her nervously.

She just glared at me for a few seconds then went back to typing. I stood there wondering what to do. Eventually she looked back up.

"You're fifteen minutes late," she said, her voice a perfect image of lemons.

Well, actually woman I was five but then you made me stand here for ten.

"Sorry," I replied instead.

Drawing in her breath with an agitated sigh, she pressed a button on a telephone.

"A woman is here to see you," she spoke into the speaker.

Technically, I'm a five year old (nearly six) girl. I guess this lady just didn't get much right. I heard a faint buzz from the receiver.

"Go down the left corridor and turn right. Take the steps up to the third floor. Turn left and go into the third office down,"

"Okay thanks," I said, once again thanking my supersonic memory.

I followed her directions and found myself situated outside a wooden door (I was hoping for a marble one) with a brass handle. I knocked on it and heard the shifting of someone in a chair.

"Come in," for some reason that voice was familiar.

I turned the handle, greeted by a sweet vampire scent.

I avoided eye contact with the person at a large desk. I know it was crazy, but I was expecting mom or dad, or Alice, even Emmett. Yeah, I'm weird.  
I sat heavily on a chair. It was brown, the back of the chair reaching around in a curve, creating an arm rest. The cushion bit was moss green and quite comfortable. Reluctantly I raised my head, to find myself look at purple irises. I blinked a few times before seeing the whole picture. Great. This was definitely not who I wanted to see.

"Renesmee. You look well,"

"Too bad I can't say the same for you," I muttered.

He chuckled and pushed a plate of biscuits towards me. I stared at it for a second then pushed it back. I didn't care about my manners, I only was polite to people who deserved it. Besides, those biscuits could be poisoned.

"I trust you have been enjoying your time in Volterra?"

I nodded and then shook my head, "Not really."

He looked surprised, "Why is that?"

I looked at him as if he was stupid. He laughed slightly again, then grew serious. I sat up straighter too and clasped my hands on the desk.

"Your diet, presumably, has just been human food. As even a half vampire, you need to have some blood in your system,"

I interrupted, "I don't like blood."

He smiled wearily, "In order to stay healthy, I believe-"

I butted in again, sighing loudly, "Fine! I'll drink the stupid blood."

"We are not blind to the fact that human blood is not, err, your preference,"

I nodded, no kidding. We have (well, not me) gold eyes. I'm pretty sure animals have something to do with it.

"I have, on behalf of the Volturi, decided that you will be escorted into the forest every three weeks, to hunt. If that is okay to you,"

"Yeah, sure. Thanks," I was itching to run out of there.

He smiled again and extended his hand. I didn't shake it but raised my eyebrows. He looked uncomfortable. I grinned.

Standing up I asked, "Can I go?"

"Of course," he said and gave me the oddest look.

I was at the door an eighth of a second later. I twisted the door handle, but then something occurred to me.

"Calix," I said, saying his name aloud for the first time, "Do you think Christian can take me?"

He frowned.

"The vamp who was doorman/guard for my room in that stony hotel place,"

"As you wish," he replied but looked slightly unhappy.

And that made me very happy. I shut the door loudly and half ran to the exit. I nearly stumbled down the steps and could see receptionist lady giving me an angry look.  
I broke out into daylight in relief. Clean, non sweet air. I smiled widely and crossed over to my car. My heart stuttered for a second and then sped up. Date guy was leaning against the driver's side, gazing up at the sun. He heard me (or my heels, they were dangerous and annoying) walking closer and smiled lazily.

"I never got your address," he told me, pulling out a piece of torn paper and a pen.

"I never got your name," I replied taking the paper and pen.

"It's Colin,"

I wordlessly wrote down the address. I handed it back to him, my fingers gently brushing his. I was expecting an electric jolt or a sudden lack of breath, anything that usually happened with _him_.

Nothing.

I told myself that not everyone had a strong bond with someone. That people didn't generally fall in love straight away.  
My smile was fake as I waved goodbye, once in my car. I drove home without thought. I continued through my day not thinking about anything except the task I was doing. I did start thinking when six o'clock came and I was covered in dough. Remind me never to make pizza again. I hadn't told Gabby or Sam (whose real name I found on his passport that morning) what I was doing that night. I rushed to my room after telling them to clean up. I showered quickly but then took half an hour deciding what to wear. I realised that I'd never been on a proper date before. Eventually I pulled on a bathrobe and rushed quickly to Gabby's room. Sure enough, she was lying across her bed on the phone.

"Gabby," I whispered.

She looked up confused, then surprised once she took in my appearance.

"I have to go. Yeah, okay. See ya. Bye," she stood up, chucking the phone on the bed.

"I need help," I said, still whispering.

Gabby rolled her eyes, "You only just realised?"

I ignored her and instead grabbed her wrist. I pulled her down the hall and into my room. I then closed the door and turned to face her.

"What do you wear on a date?" I asked, eyes fixed on her face, to see her reaction.

"A date?" Gabby started to laugh. Loudly.

"Shut up!" I hissed, although I knew Sam couldn't hear.

"Have you not seriously gone on a date before?" she said, now giggling.

I shook my head, "I never really got the chance."

"Okay," Gabby replied, sobering up.

I was glad that she didn't ask any questions. I didn't want to explain because then more questions would come. I don't like answering questions, just asking them.

Gabby marched over to my wardrobe; I followed her and stood by her side. I saw her eyebrows shoot up when she flicked through the many designer brands.

"I didn't choose them," I told her quickly.

"Right,"

"No really!" I said desperate, though I don't know why.

"Actually, I believe you. If you did pick this stuff out, you would know what to wear on a date,"

"Whatever," I retorted lamely.

I watched her in silence for a few minutes while she rifled through the clothes. Occasionally she pulled out a blouse or pants or a dress and laid it out on my bed. I had no idea how she knew what was appropriate, but then again her mom had probably told her. I felt a pang of homesickness as I thought of what Alice or Rosalie would torture me with. Although, was Gabby's mom alive when she Gabby had her first date? I stopped my train of thought right there.

"Wow," Gabby spoke suddenly.

"What?"

"This dress is beautiful,"

I examined the specimen she had in her hands. It had three different colours, white at the top, a light grey around the middle and the rest was black. It didn't look that special to me.

"It's your first date with the guy right?" she asked but didn't stop for the answer, "So this is probably a bit over the top. Where are you going?"

"Uh, I'm not sure," Now that she asked, I remembered that small detail.

"Honestly Nessie," she shook her head, "This was a spur of the moment thing wasn't it?"

"Yeah, kind of,"

"Well that changes everything," she sighed and started putting everything back.

"What are you doing?"

"You'll have to go smart casual if you don't know where you're going," she explained and attacked a section of the cupboard.

"Why?"

"You just do. Why don't you have any jeans?" Gabby complained

"I told you, I didn't pick this stuff,"

"Fine. You'll have to wear mine, though it might not fit,"

"How come?" I challenged

"You're a midget, like five foot," she laughed.

"Actually I'm five foot three," I sniffed.

From then on, we were crossing between her room and mine. She decided on a pair of dark wash jeans and this white blouse of mine that had a black lace trim. At ten to seven, I had just pulled on my clothes and was in the bathroom. I had refused to let Gabby touch my hair, so it hung down my back, like usual. I put on my make-up on how I normally did but I put my eye make-up a little darker. Finally I strapped on the scary looking shoes, as I was instructed, though I was happy that Gabby's jeans wouldn't drag on the floor now.  
By seven o'clock, I adopted my mask of cool and collected. I sat at one of the counter stools, talking to David like I would if it was any other night. I never really understood or believed in all the crap about what it means on when the guy arrives or how soon he contacts you. I just waited until five past seven when the doorbell chime sounded throughout the house. Gabby jumped up excitedly and rushed to the door. Sam had looked confused when I'd come out of my room in a different set of clothes and now I think he got the idea of what was happening. I hoped it was my imagination that saw him looking a bit depressed.

"Oh, Renesmee? Yeah, I'll just go get her," I heard Gabby say at the door.

Seconds later, I was being tugged along to the front hall. I had just stepped out when I remembered something.

"Wait, I need my purse," I said, running my hand through my hair.

Before anyone could respond and before Gabby could give me an evil death stare, I walked slowly to the back of the house. I grabbed the purse I had used that day, and transferred everything to a random one I picked off the floor. I took a deep breath before heading back out. This was my first ever date. With someone I didn't know that well, but who- Wait. Let me not think of that. Let's just focus on what is happening right in front of me. Sounds great. Oh and now I'm back to talking to myself, in my head. It that normal? Even better. So, that is most probably why I walked out with this huge grin across my face.

I changed back to I couldn't care less when I walked into the front hall. Gabby, mercifully, had gone back to sit in the main room. I avoided eye contact with Colin until after I called goodbye over my shoulder. I looked up into his eyes and smiled.

"Hello," he said returning my smile.

"Hi,"

I looked straight ahead, as we walked to his car.

"Vintage," I said

"You're into cars?"

"You sound surprised," I teased.

"I just wouldn't pick you for one,"

I laughed, "I'm not; I just know someone who is."

I listened to Colin talk about the make of his car while we were driving. I still didn't know where we were going, it was a 'surprise'. I suppose any other girl would be a little (or a lot) worried to get into a car with some stranger and not know where we were going. I'm pretty sure if I could wrestle with werewolves I could fight against a human. Speaking of werewolves, Jacob would really like this car, I'm sure I've heard him say- Not this again, picture me sighing.

"We're here," Colin announced suddenly.

"Oh," there wasn't much else to say.

* * *

_I was wondering if I should only write one story at a time or write a few. So, start new ones up and update a different one each week. I don't know, you tell me._


	10. Chapter 9: A Slip of Compare

_I know I've said this quite a few times. It's been a little (or a lot) later than when I usually update. Just right now, writing for fan fiction is kind of at the bottom of my proprieties. Workload at school has picked up and I'm barely managing a job and social life at the moment. Not to mention that I have to train extra hard to make my sport team, since I've spent about two months with my leg in a cast. Actually, this is probably boring you, but I didn't want it to sound like I was too lazy to update. I get annoyed when people do that._

_For the future: updates will probably be a few weeks apart, although I've written some chapters in advance, since I had spare time yesterday. I also have to write a short novel for an English assessment that is worth most of my semester mark, so I will be a bit preoccupied writing that. I might put it up on fiction press, for feedback because I really want to ace it._

_Question: Is an ace a really old word? Because it's been my new word obsession lately and every time I say it my friends (yes, it's a plural. Shock, horror, gasp! It that how it goes?) just sigh and shake their heads. Something along those lines._

_Moving on, after several years of author's notes__._

* * *

Chapter Nine

**August 2013**

Renesmee's POV

It wasn't a surprised 'oh', but not a disappointed 'oh' either. No shocked or worried 'oh' here. I don't believe it was an upset or happy 'oh'. Not really an excited, interested or agitated 'oh'. Couldn't pass for an angry or orgasmic 'oh'. It was an 'oh'. Plain, original flavoured, apathetic, indifferent, whatever. Because that's all it was. For some reason I was expecting a fancy or unique restaurant, something that would stand out, just not a white walled, glass door, Indian restaurant. Not like Jacob would have.

"You're not Indian are you?" Colin asked, parking his car.

"Nope, you?" I said as I pressed the release button for the seatbelt.

"Me either, just didn't want you to compare this place to something your mom made or something," he explained, opening his door.

I waited for him to come round the other side and open my door. He didn't, not like Jacob would have. I felt extremely stuck-up and stepped out, in inhuman speed, so he wouldn't notice that much of a lull.

"You ready?" Colin spoke, gazing at the brick restaurant.

Well, obviously. I didn't say anything, though. Obviously. This is just making me confused.

I felt a bit awkward standing close to Colin, without interacting. That didn't sound right.

He clearly wasn't going to take my hand or anything, not like Jacob would have, so I spun around to look for a path to take us down the small hill the car park was on. I found a gravel one, which looked a little slippery. I marched towards it, in the same determined air I had at times. The times where it didn't suit the occasion and I had no idea why I felt that way. As I waited for Colin to get the idea and come over (not wanting to look like anymore of a bitch and walk off without him), I was a little worried about sliding down the path in my heels, though at least if I walked with him I could grab onto him if I fell. He was a little slow to walk over but then maybe it was just human reflexes. Not like with Jacob. I smiled brightly at him, trying to ease up the strange amount of tension flowing between us. Not like with Jacob.

'Hope I don't fall," I commented before placing a foot further down the path.

Colin grunted. Jacob wouldn't have. My feelings towards Colin declined further. Instead of wasting your breath grunting, why don't you just say something that actually has a point? Sure enough (but weird for a half vampire, I blame it on the nerves or my mother) I had only taken two steps before I felt gravity give out from beneath me. I clutched onto Colin's arm trying to stop myself from falling. He didn't help me, just stood there. Jacob wouldn't have. Naturally then, the whole concept of using him as support, didn't work. I ended up dragging him down with me. We both fell in a tangle at the bottom of the path. I was a dazed for two seconds before I focused.

"What the fuck did you do that for?" Colin exploded nine seconds later, after standing up slowly.

I was taken aback. Jacob wouldn't have said that.

"Sorry," I stuttered, "I was falling so I grabbed the first thing I could. You know, just trying to steady myself,"

"You fucking idiot, couldn't you be less of a klutz?" he snapped, dusting his jacket off from gravel dust.

Jacob wouldn't have said that.

"Sorry," I repeated again then took a deep breath.

Within a second, my bubbling anger faded. I smiled brightly once again.

"Do you want to go now?" I asked.

Colin said nothing. Jeez, it was just a jacket. Jacob would have laughed ages ago.

I wanted this to work. I wanted to attempt a normal relationship where you didn't fall hopelessly and fast, with your eyes wide open, in love. I wanted to feel gradually my heart swell when I saw them, each time quicker and with more ferocity than the last, not just about expand and burst out of my chest the second I laid eyes on them. Normality, for once.

For this reason, I switched to my seductive smile, the one I used when I bribe my way out of a parking ticket (paying wasn't a problem but the wrath of my dad was) or negotiating with the market stall holders I sometimes visited here in Volterra land.

"Because the quicker we eat the quicker we can get out of here…" I trailed off suggestively.

Thank God for boys and their sex drives.

"Okay," he snapped and set off for the restaurant. Jacob would have laughed ages ago.

I followed at a slower pace, desperately clinging to the thought of normal. It didn't look to good anymore.

I stepped into the entrance of the place a second after Colin did. Spices and a small, middle-aged woman, who was already talking to Colin, greeted me.

"For two," he said, adopting the charming tone I had heard the first time I met him.

What the hell? Maybe he just anger management issues or something.

"This way," she said, in heavily accented English.

We were seated at a circular red table and soft matching chairs, next to a window. I sat down, guessing (rightly) that Colin wouldn't pull out my chair. I looked outside, but only saw dumpsters placed up against what looked like the kitchen and the toilet block. Instead, I checked out the restaurant. It was mainly orange and red, with only a few Indian decorations on the feature wall. I could hear the faint sound of clattering and shouting coming from the kitchen. I could also pick out a few sentences from the other people around us. A girl from a group of what looked like very grown up teenagers caught my attention.

"Look at the chick with the curls, the one with at the window. But you she doesn't-"

"-Aren't you going to look at your menu?" Colin interrupted, still in his charming personality.

I wasn't buying it that much now. Jacob didn't have split personalities. I had missed what the girl (with bubblegum pink hair, in the same style I remembered when I watched Cabaret, ages ago.) had said, but I saw them all laughing and looking over their shoulders towards me.

"Sure," I replied after a second and in point, I picked up the plastic card.

There were classic foods like butter chicken, all something I'd had before. Well, at least there was some normality here.

"I think I'll have rogan josh,"

"There's not much interesting here," I replied, without thinking.

"Well sorry, Miss I'm So Above You," he snapped back at me.

Jacob didn't have split personalities. The regret of agreeing to go out tonight was starting to come thick and fast.

Waiters were scarce, so we had to wait around for a while to order. It was approaching half an hour without speaking so I attempted to break the silence.

"What do you do for a living?" I said as politely as I could.

"I suppose if say, you'll go off at me about what it is, because you're so much better, right?"

I think that was where the simmering pot of rage started to boil.

Me? I was the one who went off at him? He was the one that he reacted angrily to every little thing. How could I be so stupid and not see past the alluring atmosphere he had produced? But why in the first place would he want to take me out, act so nice, just to be a jerk?

Then it clicked. All I was to him was a girl. A woman. Someone who was legal. Get the picture?

Since nearly a year ago, I had been wolf whistled out. Why? Because I had a body, that's why. Because for some God forsaken reason, males liked what they saw. I knew this but I still fell for someone, slightly more gifted at lying than the others. He didn't want me for who I was. God, who the fuck would? Oh yeah, there was one guy who I'd kinda left halfway across the world, who thought that maybe I was worth falling in love with. One guy who wouldn't care if I was three hundred pounds, had a nervous twitch and hummed mission impossible under my breath.

I'd believed that I could get on without out him, on the thought that it was the only way that neither him or my family would get hurt. But I couldn't.

"I can't get over him," I whispered aloud, needing to implant it in my brain.

"What are you on about crazy bitch?" Colin hissed under his breath, "People are going to start to look."

Who the fuck cares? And another thing, since when did Nessie Cullen swear? Hadn't I always thought that people who cursed couldn't express themselves properly? My life seriously needs to take therapy. I was comparing all the time. This guy crosses his arms this same. That man over there could seriously learn some lessons about amorous affection in public from Jacob. That one doesn't do this, that one had the same that. I was judging without being a judge. Everyone had a story, an explanation.

"I have to go," I told Colin and rose from my chair quickly.

"Stupid bitch," he muttered under his breath then snapped his fingers at a waitress, "We're leaving."

"No, it's okay, you stay here," I said desperately, not wanting to spend another minute with _that._

"And take my car? No fucking way," he replied in an undertone again.

Obviously, his image was important. I wondered if he was one of those local, well-known players who prayed on foreigners and tourists. Maybe that was why we got furtive glances ever so often from the same group of teenage girls. I felt like asking if he had bi-polar.

"I'll walk," I replied instead.

I turned on my heel (like when the girl gets upset at her future boyfriend in movies) and clicked out of the small brick building without a backwards glance. I had an unmoving, exaggerated smile on my lips, which stayed frozen all the way back up the gravel drive. Luckily I didn't fall again.

While I headed back to the road, I kept mentally kicking myself. I'd come too close to something I swore I would never let happen. Remembering. Now it was too late. Suddenly I found myself on top of the hill. Just to the left was Colin's car, which I could easily hotwire. Or straight ahead was the main road, it would only take about half an hour to head back home. I decided against hitchhiking. It would be tricky to try to explain what happened when (if) they attacked me.

_Sorry officer, but you see I just had this sudden mass of power that let me smash his face up into his skull. More self defence, not really manslaughter. No I'm not French, I'm actually a freaky half human half vampire mix._

That would go down so well.

With a deep breath, I turned right instead and plunged into the green, thick forest surrounding the border of everything in this place.

* * *

_Hopefully, fingers crossed, wishing away etc, that next week a fresh chapter will be up._


	11. Chapter Sorry and an Excerpt

_This is just to let you know what's going with updating and all that jazz. Story of my life; computer apparently blew up inside, I didn't even try to understand how that happened when the IT guy explained, which basically means my hardrive was wiped. Luckily it should (I haven't check yet but it was a default with the motherboard) be covered by insurance, so I will be getting a new computer soon. I dare not attempt to operate the family computer; it dates back to Windows 2000 and freezes often. I don't particularly want to store chapters on my mother's computer in fear that she will forward them to relatives with the heading of 'Look at my little darling; attempting to accomplish something in life'. Okay, maybe not exactly like that but that will be the general meaning. Oh and if this doesn't happen to you, I have this theory that you have a normal family. Because real life is a bitch, that means I have to rewrite chapters (which sucks because I was excited that I had written ahead) with no fixed way of typing and uploading. I'll try to get access to a computer wherever I can, though if I carry it around on a flash drive I'll most likely lose it. On another note, our insurance company don't understand the concept of quick, so I don't know how long it's going to take. _

_Because I feel bad about this, I've quickly written a _small section_ of the next chapter because I've been able to use my cousin's computer. They just so happen to live three hours away too because my life isn't liking me at the moment. I've wrote about half of what the original chapter was like._

_Sorry again._

Chapter Ten Excerpt

Renesmee's POV

**August 2013**

The forest smelt like dirt and rain as I smashed my way through, literally. I didn't slow down out of my vampire speed, taking the sharp piercing of branches as a relief. Not needing to think, just following my instincts, was something I'd missed. I inhaled deeply as I approached what seemed like the middle of the forest. As fresh oxygen carried itself into my lungs, a scent went along too.

Blood.

Suddenly all I could focus on was the sound of wet, pumping blood, the heavy pulse carrying through an animal.

God, I hoped it was an animal.

Just like that, with one semi-rational thought, I zoned away. It took me by surprise how much control I had over something that was a dominant part of me. The effort though, left me panting while a slow burning consumed my throat. I swallowed but with it had no effect. Then I remembered, it was what it felt like to be thirsty, something I hadn't felt since I was about three. After that, I hated having to drink blood because it made me feel physically and mentally sick. Not to mention the taste reminded me of copper and salt. Therefore, it was decided that I would only need to hunt once a month, since it apparently kept me healthy. Now I actually wanted, yearned, for something to smother the flames in my throat. I saw it then, the brown bear whose scent was still circling around my brain, still making me a little dizzy. If I remembered correctly, it was a Marsican bear, native to Italy and once endangered. Okay, so the last part made me feel a little bit bad that I was about to drain it's blood, but hey, the population is thriving again.

Suddenly, the afternoon's activities crashed down on me. I think the whole hunting thing triggered it, since I did have a conversation about it earlier on. I wasn't so excited about blood anymore. What a very stupid person I was to be able to … let's test how good this self control thing was. I'd already screamed and beaten myself up mentally about this Colin (more commonly known as fucking dickhead) guy, so why continue now? Maybe if I focus on the meeting, remember the fire that was going on down my oesophagus.

Slowly, like I was coming off some high, the blaze came back and I could focus on blood once again. That just made me sound like some half crazed blood drinker. Well, it wasn't that far off the truth. God, I needed a life. What better way to do it than have a little socialising over a few brown bears? All this remembering-focusing reminded me (as it should) of Calix's deal.

Grinning, I reached for my cell phone grasping at the empty air on my left. I didn't have my purse. You know those moments when you're looking for a pen, getting all annoyed, then you find it in your hand? Well, there was my purse, hanging off my right arm, on a silver chain. I opened the clasp and moved aside a few things until I found my cell. I had found in one of the suitcases the Volturi had left in my room at the house, quite new- one of those touch screen ones. The screen had been replaced about three times; it wasn't my fault that I put too much force when I tried to dial. What could I say? It was natural. I gently tapped the screen, bringing it to life and activated the contact list. I hadn't gone through the list fully yet, so I searched for the letter c, in the vain hope that I could get through to Christian without talking to Calix first. It seemed that cell phones were part of every Volturi vampire's kit because a deep voice answered on the first ring.

"Hello?"

"Hey," I replied, slightly surprised out how calm I sounded, compared to how excited I felt.

There was a slight pause before the answer, "Renesmee?"

"You bet. Anyway, listen, I have a problem,"

"Yes?" he asked tersely, probably remembering our previous conversations where I babbled on about nothing.

"I'm in the middle of this forest and I'm thirsty, so I was wondering if you wanted to join me? Actually, no, you kind of have to join me, I think, because that creepy Calix guy said something along those lines," I took a breath before continuing cheerfully, "How about it?"

"You are in the forest wanting to hunt. I am correct?"

"Yep, so you up to it?"

I thought for a moment about if he had said 'like a date?'. I smiled, giggled and then I laughed loudly, the sounded ringing throughout the forest. Maybe that's why there was another one second pause.

"I will depart now because, as you put it, I kind of have to join you. Calix did say something similar,"

"Great. You know, I've really missed having someone laughing at my jokes,"

"Goodbye Renesmee," I could tell he was smiling.

I pressed end call without responding, I would see him soon anyway. Plus, the quicker he got here the quicker I could drink.

There was a crunching of branches on my left that startled me. It was too soon for Christian to have arrived.

I took a breath and crouched into a defence position. I faced whoever had made that sound.

And I was sure it wasn't an animal.

Claudia Soll


	12. Chapter 10: Safe

_I had to go into to school today (which is how I really wanted to spend my Sunday) for a project because I needed special computer software. So, there I was flicking through songs that I could use and after about four I got really inspired to write a chapter. It meant staying back for another half an hour, but at least as long as people wanted to read it, I think it was worth it. _

_The links to the songs from YouTube (I suggest you use my links because they are well-practiced ones) that I thought were good 'soundtracks' (if that's the right word) are below, and if anyone's interested I can send you more titles._

_Caught In Between the Daybreak-- .com/watch?v=VUHqnu67V2Y  
__Dreams Bright and Beautiful -- .com/watch?v=jx98XpqLwAs_

_I bring you chapter ten, which I added on the first part of it from last chapter. It's a little shorter than the others, but oh well._

* * *

Chapter Ten

The forest smelt like dirt and rain as I smashed my way through, literally. I didn't slow down out of my vampire speed, taking the sharp piercing of branches as a relief. Not needing to think, just following my instincts, was something I'd missed. I inhaled deeply as I approached what seemed like the middle of the forest. As fresh oxygen carried itself into my lungs, a scent went along too.

Blood.

Suddenly all I could focus on was the sound of wet, pumping blood, the heavy pulse carrying through an animal.

God, I hoped it was an animal.

Just like that, with one semi-rational thought, I zoned away. It took me by surprise how much control I had over something that was a dominant part of me. The effort though, left me panting while a slow burning consumed my throat. I swallowed but with it had no effect. Then I remembered, it was what it felt like to be thirsty, something I hadn't felt since I was about three. After that, I hated having to drink blood because it made me feel physically and mentally sick. Not to mention the taste reminded me of copper and salt. Therefore, it was decided that I would only need to hunt once a month, since it apparently kept me healthy. Now I actually wanted, yearned, for something to smother the flames in my throat. I saw it then, the brown bear whose scent was still circling around my brain, still making me a little dizzy. If I remembered correctly, it was a Marsican bear, native to Italy and once endangered. Okay, so the last part made me feel a little bit bad that I was about to drain it's blood, but hey, the population is thriving again.

Suddenly, the afternoon's activities crashed down on me. I think the whole hunting thing triggered it, since I did have a conversation about it earlier on. I wasn't so excited about blood anymore. What a very stupid person I was to be able to … let's test how good this self control thing was. I'd already screamed and beaten myself up mentally about this Colin (more commonly known as fucking dickhead) guy, so why continue now? Maybe if I focus on the meeting, remember the fire that was going on down my oesophagus.

Slowly, like I was coming off some high, the blaze came back and I could focus on blood once again. That just made me sound like some half crazed blood drinker. Well, it wasn't that far off the truth. God, I needed a life. What better way to do it than have a little socialising over a few brown bears? All this remembering-focusing reminded me (as it should) of Calix's deal.

Grinning, I reached for my cell phone grasping at the empty air on my left. I didn't have my purse. You know those moments when you're looking for a pen, getting all annoyed, then you find it in your hand? Well, there was my purse, hanging off my right arm, on a silver chain. I opened the clasp and moved aside a few things until I found my cell. I had found in one of the suitcases the Volturi had left in my room at the house, quite new- one of those touch screen ones. The screen had been replaced about three times; it wasn't my fault that I put too much force when I tried to dial. What could I say? It was natural. I gently tapped the screen, bringing it to life and activated the contact list. I hadn't gone through the list fully yet, so I searched for the letter c, in the vain hope that I could get through to Christian without talking to Calix first. It seemed that cell phones were part of every Volturi vampire's kit because a deep voice answered on the first ring.

"Hello?"

"Hey," I replied, slightly surprised out how calm I sounded, compared to how excited I felt.

There was a slight pause before the answer, "Renesmee?"

"You bet. Anyway, listen, I have a problem,"

"Yes?" he asked tersely, probably remembering our previous conversations where I babbled on about nothing.

"I'm in the middle of this forest and I'm thirsty, so I was wondering if you wanted to join me? Actually, no, you kind of have to join me, I think, because that creepy Calix guy said something along those lines," I took a breath before continuing cheerfully, "How about it?"

"You are in the forest wanting to hunt. I am correct?"

"Yep, so you up to it?"

I thought for a moment about if he had said 'like a date?'. I smiled, giggled and then I laughed loudly, the sounded ringing throughout the forest. Maybe that's why there was another one second pause.

"I will depart now because, as you put it, I kind of have to join you. Calix did say something similar,"

"Great. You know, I've really missed having someone laughing at my jokes,"

"Goodbye Renesmee," I could tell he was smiling.

I pressed end call without responding, I would see him soon anyway. Plus, the quicker he got here the quicker I could drink.

There was a crunching of branches on my left that startled me. It was too soon for Christian to have arrived.

I took a breath and crouched into a defence position. I faced whoever had made that sound.

And I was sure it wasn't an animal.

The breath I had taken in a few moments ago, rushed out of me in relief.

"You scared me," I accused, my eyes narrowing, but I was grinning.

"Sorry," Christian walked forwards further and surveyed the small area, not looking at me.

"How did you get her so quickly?" I questioned, searching for the brown bear that had lumbered off somewhere.

"I- just, well- lucky guess," he replied.

"You're a bad liar. Vampires are supposed to be good at deception," I reminded him, only half joking.

Christian sighed, his calm composure gone for once, "Maybe I do not like lying."

My forehead creased as I wondered what he meant, "So you _are_ lying?"

His ruby eyes meet mine (reminding me of blood, ironically enough) as if he was trying to convey something.

Naturally, I jumped to the worst possible conclusion.

The Volturi aren't the 'just in the area and wanted to pop in and see how you were' type. There were reasons, for everything. A motivation behind every action. Like in films, the director never added a red curtain here and a black cat there, just because they felt like it.

The only reason Christian could have been in close proximity was that they'd found out, realised what I'd done.

At this very minute I could practically _see_ the Volturi creeping up towards me in a circle, planning to take me by surprise.

I stiffened and closed my eyes waiting for a reply. After a long pause (for a vampire) he spoke:

"I was following you,"

I didn't open my eyes, suspicions confirmed. I just nodded and waited for the rest. It took me a minute and a half to realise there wasn't going to be any more.

"Why?" I cleared my throat, surprised out the croak m voice had turned to, and tried again, "Why were you following me?"

A slight breeze caressed my arms. Goosebumps formed across my skin.

Christian hesitated again, "I've been following you since you left the care of the Volturi."

Okay, that was so not what I had been expecting. My eyes flew open in surprise, and I felt my eyebrows in my hairline.

"Oh. How come?" I managed, trying to gain eye contact to see if he was lying. It didn't work.

"Calix didn't feel … safe about letting you out alone. Without your family, I mean. He feels that it must be hard, which was probably the main reason he requested a meeting with you. Aro agreed with him and appointed me to keep an eye on you,"

Despite how ridiculous it was, I blushed. It was probably the first time since I left home that my cheeks had been something other than white. He had most likely seen my, uh date, only a few minutes ago. Christian probably thought I was an idiot. What else was new?

"So you were already in the forest when I called you?" I asked, bending down to pick up a golden leaf.

"The outskirts. I would have been much closer, but there was a minor occurrence that came up,"

I nodded, "Well that makes more sense. Had me all freaked out." I was surprised at how shaky more voice still was.

I let go of the leaf and watched it flutter in the slight breeze to my left. It left my vision and I felt a strange urge to run after it.

Christian was eager to move on from that topic. I could tell by the way he debated each word he was going to say and the way he was currently ripping branches off a nearby tree. I decided to help the situation.

"Ready to hunt?" I smiled as I wandered over to where he was.

I took his hand in mine; the comparison of hand sizes nudged a familiar pocket in the recess of my mind. I finally met his eye and a look of understand flashed between us. This was only for comfort, pure comfort; to take the sharp edge away of the conclusion I had jumped to.

For the first time in months, I felt almost safe.

Almost as safe as I did when it was the cold, smooth and hard skin of vampire family.

Almost as safe as I did when it was the rougher, warmer, different hands of my Jacob.

* * *

_I think I've neglected these disclaimer things, but I'm sure it's obvious I'm no Stephenie Meyer.  
__I finished the Host yesterday, by her, and now I have no doubt that's she a pretty damn good author. _

_Reviews, are like, wow _:)


	13. Chapter 11: Not Quite Right

_I've snuck into my sister's apartment so I could write. Let's just hope she doesn't come back from work early._

_In this chapter, I didn't write the hunting scene because throats, especially jugulars, creep me out a little. I can thank my biology teacher for that._

* * *

Chapter Eleven

Renesmee's POV

**August 2013**

I walked up the red-brick driveway, feeling sloshy. Before I opened the gate, I turned and waved to Christian, in his black car. I could just see him nod through the midnight tint as he quietly reversed back out onto the street. I stood inside the parameter of the fence and watched the car leave then dug around for my key.

I was expecting Gabby to come bounding out and harassing me with questions, but no one greeted me when I unlocked the door to the house. It was pitch black and I could only hear the quiet hum of appliances. I shivered slightly, unnerved by the lack of habitation visible and locked the door again. I left the front hall and my hand found the light panel from memory. The large house came to life under the florescent bulbs, but still no Gabby or Sam for that matter. I dumped my purse on the kitchen counter and checked the wall clock. Five past nine, earlier than I thought. Gabby would still be at work but that didn't explain George's and Sam's disappearance. The answering machine didn't beep either and there was no note on the refrigerator. I shivered again and decided to check all the rooms. I panicked when David was missing from his bed before realising that he wouldn't have been left alone in the house.

When I returned to the kitchen, I grabbed my cell phone and called George. After three rings, he picked up and I heard a quiet babble in the background.

"George speaking,"

"Hey it's Nessie. I was kinda wondering where you are,"

"Didn't Sam tell you? I had to fly to Chicago for a work conference," he explained then muttered, "Only got told at the last minute."

"Huh, Sam's not here either. Weird,"

"Weird," he agreed, " No note?"

"Don't think so, though I better go make sure,"

"Okay then, I'll let you go. I'll be back in two days. Bye Nessie," George said, sounding slightly relieved. That was weird too.

"Night George," I said before hanging up.

I double-checked the little clipboard on the fridge again, but saw nothing. I then searched the rest of the kitchen in case he had put something elsewhere. Then I saw it, a white folded piece of paper, lying on the floor underneath the oven. I picked it up and quickly unfolded it. Sam's block letters were scribbled down the page.

YO NESS

GONE OUT WITH SOME PEOPLE. DAVID AT BABYSITTER'S. WONDERING IF YOU DATE'S CAR NEEDS TO BE CLEANED…

SAM

I smiled a little, then grinned. Everything was fine. I sighed and tossed the paper in the bin. I had just grabbed my stuff from the counter and was about to head back to my room, when my cell chirped. Literally. I wondered who had changed my ring tone.

"Hello?" I answered.

" It's me, Gabby,"

"What's the problem?"

"I have the broken car remember?" she laughed.

"Oh right, I forgot,"

"Because your date had stamina like-"

"Shut up or I'll make you walk," I threatened," And my _date_ was a complete dickhead."

"Sucks to be you," she muttered sarcastically.

I drew in a fake agitated breath.

"Okay, okay! See you soon," she replied and ended the call.

I screwed my eyes shut, fighting a wave of sudden tiredness. Then I marched back out of the house.

**Gabby's POV**

I was smiling when I said goodbye to Ness. She needed to relax, there was a lot going for her; pretty, smart and funny. Sometimes it was so easy to talk to her, the conversation flowed and I could tell her anything. With some topics, I could practically see her clamp her mouth shut, and she only replied with one-word answers. She was hiding something, something that involved her family back home. That's what I didn't get about her, if she was miserable why didn't she just go back home. From what I'd heard they were pretty rich, so she should be able to get a ticket back. Or she was making up stories about where she went on holidays and the times her family argued over who got to drive which car. But Nessie wasn't a liar, just one of those people who left out information and when she did it was pretty obvious.

I slumped down into the pavement lining the perimeter of the restaurant, _La Cascade_, where I worked. It was weird to have a French restaurant in the middle of Italy, but this town was strange anyway, what with the stone buildings everywhere and the black cloaked people who lived in the centre of the city. People who never went into the sunlight and were too beautiful; graceful and slender with ruby eyes. Actually, the eyes were really creepy.

And, they had something to do with _her_ dying, I knew it.

I mean, why where they swarming all over my house afterwards? Sending me to counsellors who were just like them, trying to figure out exactly what I knew. That just proved my utterly crazy point; they weren't human. Trust me, I stopped believing in fairies and Santa Claus when I was eight, but I just… Ugh, there was no point in thinking about it now. You know, in a way they reminded me of Nessie, but she was even more pretty, stunning, and she had these bambi eyes. Moreover, she wouldn't kill anyone.

A slight drizzle began and I shrunk closer to the wall, trying to get under cover. It was pointless, so I sat there in the rain. It occurred to me it would take a while for Nessie to come and I could go back inside, but I was too lazy.

Instead, I moped about that dickhead who wanted to go on some family holiday (a.k.a boring crap) then go to prom with me, Gabby fucking James. I laughed a little aloud when I realised how stuck up I sounded.

Just then, a shadow covered me from the white light of the street lamp. I looked up, and my heart began to pump faster, panic swimming in my brain.

A tall, over six feet, built-like-a-brick man was towering over me.

Desperately trying to keep my cool, I opened my mouth to try to ask what he wanted. A whimper came out instead. Oh great, Gabby. The man stepped back a little and the light hit him.

I could only stare.

He looked gorgeous, a little rugged with copper skin and dark eyes. I watched as the raindrops hit his skin, they sort of hissed as if his skin was like a furnace. It left him looking shiny, the water coating his skin wonderfully.

"Sorry if I scared you, "he said huskily and I probably looked like a guppy.

"It's okay. I just overacted a little because well, it's a deserted car park and you're massive," I replied because Gabby James _always_ had an answer, no matter how stupid she sounded.

The guy laughed and I melted a little.

"I was wondering if you knew where I could find Fortuna Street? Number 34 if that helps,"

I swallowed audibly, "Considering I live there, I'm pretty sure I know. If you weren't a creepy person who approached me in the middle of the night, I would offer you a lift since someone's coming to pick me up soon. Shit, I hope you're not going to kill me or something. That would suck."

I think he was a little surprised because his eyebrows where nearly past his head.

"Do, like, you live- I mean you're not, um, kidding?" his words come out in a barley coherent mumble.

I cocked my head to the side, "You're gonna have to make sense if you want me to answer."

He lifted his head and for the first time gave me eye contact. Something in his eyes changed, softened almost and he stood stock-still for a minute. Small tremors rocked his body when he pulled his head away from mine but his body edged closer to me, like I was pulling it. Okay, he was really starting to freak me out.

I heard a crunch of tires and in front of me I saw the wheels of car pulled up neatly into a parking bay. There was only one person who drove that well. I jumped eagerly wondering if Nessie knew who he was. I headed for the driver's window but to my surprise she had gotten out of the car. Somehow, she had made it past me and onto the curb in a few seconds. Ness stood dumbfounded and the guy was up in a flash.

I heard her breathe a one syllable name and then she had her arms wrapped tightly around him.

* * *

_I noticed yesterday that I am really unlucky when it come to computers._

_I've been replying to questions people have left on my phone, so my replies might sound a little weird because it's harder to type and stuff._

_Give food to the comment box _:)


	14. Chapter 12: Excited Chatter

_This one's a little shorter than most but I only had about ten minutes to write, edit and upload this.  
Blame my sister._

* * *

Chapter Twelve

Renesmee's POV

**August 2013**

"Nessie? You missed the turn off," Gabby said from the back seat.

"I did? Oops. Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, so then there's David, a cutie who's turning four in a week, pretty excited about it too. He wants a pirate party- oh! You can be Captain Hook or the leader guy! What do you think Seth?"

"Sounds great Ness," he rolled his eyes, "You wanna slow down a little?"

I couldn't help it. It was the first time in nearly a year that I had seen him. Seth, the always happy werewolf. And so close to being Jacob. I sighed mentally. I'd promised self a few minutes ago, after I had gotten over the shock of seeing him, that I would avoid thinking about the fact that Seth had connection with everyone back home. I would ask him later about everyone else, I just wanted to enjoy the fact he was here.

I pulled into the driveway of the house after having to concentrate, which was unusual considering I normally drove from instinct.

"We're here," I announced cheerfully.

"Uh, it's cool," he replied, stepping out of the car.

"You mean the same as everything else?"

"Pretty much," Seth grinned.

He suddenly stiffened as Gabby walked by. I was a little concerned, Seth normally got along with everyone, did Gabby say something to offend him? That would have been near impossible, but I decided not to say anything.

I opened the front door and stepped back to let everyone in. I quickly closed and locked it and began talking again.

"David should be home since Sam's car was in the garage but he's probably asleep because it's-" I paused as I put down my purse on the kitchen counter and glanced at the clock, "-nine thirty. Anyway, George is in on business trip so he's not here either. Oh, hi Sam, this is Seth."

He had just stumbled out from the back hallway. I held back a smile when I saw him take in Seth's build, I could just imagine him meeting some of the other bigger wolves.

"Hey," Seth said good-naturedly.

Sam replied with a grunt before walking over to one of the kitchen cupboards and pulling out a glass. Somebody had their manperiod.

"I'm going to finish off my homework and then go to bed," Gabby said, throwing a smirk to her brother and saying sweetly, "Night Nessie, night Nessie's boyfriend. Goodnight Samantha. "

Sam continued with his pouring of milk , a scowl playing across his features. I rolled my eyes and slumped down into one of the counter chairs, sighing. It had been a really long night and I was about to fall asleep right there and then. Which reminded me of something.

"There's no spare bedrooms left, Seth. So, I guess you'll have to sleep on the couch or something,"

I was expecting a remark from Sam about his bed and me, but he still didn't say anything.

"Nah, that's okay. I was going to sleep somewhere else anyway," he replied.

"What, on the street? In a car? Oh, maybe the park bench?" I retorted, "Honestly, it's not like it's going to kill anyone if you bunk here for a while."

I watched Sam cut between where I was sitting and Seth was standing. Okay, maybe it would.

"You're going to be early," I called.

He turned around before going down the hall.

"I have to get up early," he said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Alright. Goodnight," I got a slamming door as a response. Yeesh.

I smiled apologetically at Seth, "He must be, ah, under pressure. Don't know about you but I could really do with a good night's sleep. Let me get you a pillow and a blanket."

"Rough day, huh?" Seth asked following me to the linen cupboard near the bedrooms.

"It's a long story. I'll tell you sometime, like tomorrow," then I said a little louder, "When there's no eavesdroppers."

I heard an exasperated sigh coming from Gabby's room. I managed to find a couple of pillows but a small blanket, or in Seth's case a very, very small one. It wasn't like he needed it though.

We talked few a minutes about what I had been doing, as if I hadn't been dragged against my will (well, it wasn't against my will but I didn't want to) away to Italy. We both agreed to talk about _everything_ tomorrow, where we wouldn't have to worry about Gabby, Sam or David hearing anything they shouldn't.

I gave him another hug before saying goodnight. I walked slowly until he lay down, making sure he wasn't planning on leaving. That would suck and it would take a lot to convince me it hadn't been dream. Hope had left me for a while and with Seth's return, it decided to stay for a glass of wine.

Once in my room, I took a shower quickly, pretending to rinse off all the crap that happened that day. I think I stayed in there a little too long because the mirrors had a thick coating of steam and the room felt really dense and suffocating. I escaped the sauna-torture chamber in relief. I took a deep breath and then it hit me. One of the most delicious things I had ever smelt.

A werewolf scent.

Sure, it could have been Seth's, but each werewolf had something slightly different in their smell. Like vampires, after you got over their 'make you wanna puke' sweetness, apparently.

And this scent, well.

Autumn, forests, rain and campfires.

There was no fucking way Jacob Black had been in my room.

* * *

_Good news, get my computer in two weeks!_

_Oh and I'll tell the person who guesses Nessie's secret (there are a few clues in the story so far, and a massive hint in this chapter) anything about what's going to happen.  
__  
I found on one of my receipts: thank you, call again.  
No one else found it funny but I did. I just thought I'd share that with y'all. I admit it was the highlight of my day, which is depressing.__  
_


	15. Chapter Sorry II

Hey guys,

I've had a lot of life going on these past few months and I know I haven't updated anything for AGES. I'm really, really, really sorry. Like really sorry. When I finally got the chance to continue writing Never Stopped Loving You, nothing happened. Even though I know exactly what's going to happen and how it's going to end, I don't have the urge, I guess, to write it. And I cannot write anything of any interest when I don't have that kind of mind set. So, for now, the trail has gone cold and I'm taking a break from FanFiction, but I PROMISE all of you that I WILL return and finish writting. I don't know if that will be in a few weeks, months or even next year, but once I can feel that sort of power (I really can't explain it) and excitement to write more about Nessie and Jacob and co., I'll be right back here, simply because I can't wait to finish their story. I'm not abandoning my stories, I never will, I need to feel like I'm not forcing myself to write.

I'm more focused at the moment on writting my own fiction, so if you want you can catch me on fiction press under Future Lines, linked on my profile. I'll be writing on there until I return. I really hope you guys understand what I'm saying. Typing, whatever :)

Enjoy life, trust me, I know now that you never know when it will collapse around you.

Tess.

P.S, I'm sorry. And really cold. It's raining, so it's cold. Which is why I'm cold. Yeah.


	16. Chapter 13: With a Knife

_Okay, so I know I just uploaded saying how I wasn't going to write for ages, but there is a story I need to tell you guys._

_You know how some nights you just can't get to sleep? I hate those. Anyway, so I was being very bored and trying to fall asleep when I started to think about Eclipse. I'm not a big fan of the movies and I was thinking about Robert Pattinson's face (don't flame me please, he's just a little too creepy for my taste) when I started to think about this story. And BINGO.  
__Inspiration!!!  
__I was so excited that it took me another half an hour to fall asleep. Basically, I'm back again, but my updates won't be that regular because real life is still being a bitch. And I know lots of you hate me for disappearing for ages, but let me tell you a secret; everyone hates me. High five to the one who can figure out where I stole that from :)_

_Enjoy!_

* * *

Chapter Thirteen

Renesmee's POV

* * *

**August 2013**

The tension was so thick the next morning, between Seth and Sam, that I could cut it with a knife. I first noticed it around breakfast time. Since it was a sunny Saturday morning, I had sudden inspiration to make a full sized breakfast for everyone, sans George who was only due back tomorrow from his business trip. Fate had decided to place me between Seth and Sam at the dining room table, while Gabby and David were opposite.  
David had engaged Seth in a detailed conversation about his birthday party next week and Gabby was busy indulging me with shit about her ex-prom partner. Sam was quiet, something extremely unusual considering there were numerous times when he could tease his sister. I had just asked Seth if he had found the couch comfortable enough, when Sam spoke.

"So, are you like, planning to stay here for a while?"

"Oh, well um, I just need to talk to Ness here, and-"Seth began, while I just gaped a little at Sam for being so rude.

"C'mon Samantha, leave Nessie and her boyfriend alone," Gabby cut in, rolling her eyes.

"He's not my boyfriend," I said.

"You sure Nessie? Because you can be completely open with us," Gabby replied and at the same time, Seth gave an indignant "What?"

"Let me guess, fuck buddies?" Sam said in a sardonic tone.

"Sam!" I yelled.

"What are you, my mother?" he retorted.

There was a sudden, uncomfortable silence.

"You know what, I'm not hungry anymore," I stood up and started to clear the table.

As I snatched Seth's plate away from him, (even though he wasn't finished and would most likely go hungry until lunch) I felt a little guilty – after all it wasn't his fault that Sam was being an obnoxious dickhead. Moreover, I still didn't know what his problem with Seth was, and it was as annoying as Volturi.  
Gabby got up too and dragged David off to get him dressed. Sam left, slamming the front door behind him without a word.

"I'm sorry," I apologised as Seth helped me load the dishwasher.

"It's not your fault," he replied good-naturedly.

"Things are a little rough I guess, without their mother," I told him, even though that had nothing to do with it.

"Yeah," he seemed far away as he spoke.

We cleaned in silence until breakfast was a memory. There was a brief argument, in which I won, resulting in Seth going and buying some more clothes since he had only one pair of jeans and two shirts. While he was gone, I quickly showered and changed, dropping off David at a friend's on the way to pick up Seth.

"I'm taking you out to lunch," I announced when he climbed in. I figured it was a good apology for being a bitch back at breakfast.

"Cool, I was dreaming about a hamburger back there,"

I rolled my eyes and pulled onto the main road. The place I had in mind was a thirty-minute drive and apparently had the best lasagne in all of Volterra. About ten minutes in, the inevitable came up in our conversation.

"You seem to get along with everyone back there," Seth said.

"They're alright. Grateful, mostly, I think. I stop the ants from invading," I grinned.

"You said they didn't have a mom,"

"No," My voice broke, "They were attacked my vampires."

"Oh,"

"Yeah," I said shakily.

"_Your_ mom misses you,"

"What, is that supposed to mean," I could feel my temper start to rise.

"Nothing. We just want you to come home, Ness." Seth's voice was gentle and he reminded me so much of Jacob that my voice grew croaky with unshed tears.

"It's not that simple,"

"They think I'm studying at a community college in Seattle,"

"I can't tell you why,"

We were both talking at each other instead of _to_ each other.

"You leaving has been hard on everyone,"

"It's been hard on me," I admitted, unwilling to let go of my deepest secret.

"Why do they want you here?" Seth asked, and for once, the natural smile he had on his face when he talked, disappeared.

"I don't know," I whispered, "To monitor me? They'd lock you up too if they could."

I suddenly realised the truth of my words.

"Oh God! What am I doing?" I swerved onto the emergency lane, breathing hard.

"Woah Nessie, calm down!"

"You're not safe here! You have to leave! Now!" I spoke quickly and my head started to pound.

"Calm down," Seth repeated, "Take deep breaths."

I obeyed and felt myself relaxing a bit, in spite of the speed of my thoughts.

"Now tell me what the hell it is you're taking,"

"The Volturi," I tried again, making sure to go slowly, "They're scared of what they don't know. Scared of half vamps, like me. Scared of werewol- shape shifters, like you. They'll want to 'keep an eye' on you Seth. You need to leave."

"They don't know I'm here. I made sure of that,"

" Don't you get it? They'll smell you out, Seth!" I said, starting to panic again.

"Nessie, there's millions of people coming in and out of here and-"

"No! You're with _me. _They're checking up on me! I'm here as a security camera, making sure those kids don't know what happened to their mother. Saving their fucking skins, Seth. You're with me. They'll take you in an instant! You have to go!"

"So that's why you're here. Blackmail, almost. Helping them out," Seth breathed, " I thought it was just ironic that you came to Volterra of all places. One of the emails must have been missing." This time he was talking to himself.

"What?" I said in utter disbelief. Surely, he couldn't be talking about …

Seth made eye contact with me, "I know about the emails, Nessie."

"Excuse me?" This could NOT be happening. All the care I took to cover it up! Stupid, stupid!

"I said, I know. I know, Renesmee, that you exchanged yourself to the Volturi. You gave yourself up instead of creating a war,"

And then I fainted for the first time in my life.

* * *

_Nessie's secret is revealed …_


	17. Chapter 14: Fuck, Shit, Damn

_Don't know if I'll be able to get the next chapter up in the next two or so weeks, but I'll try : )_

* * *

Chapter Fourteen

Renesmee's POV

**August 2013**

I woke up lying across the back seats of the car. I breathed in the scent of baby powder and leather, while I tried to locate where Seth was. I couldn't hear anything apart from the cars whizzing by and the sound of a radio playing some awful techno song. I decided to sit up and as soon as I did, my head began to swim and vision dimmed. Okay, not good.

"Seth?" I called out pathetically.

No answer.

I waited seven minutes until trying again. Still, no answer. I started to panic. What ifs crowded my mind and my heartbeat raced. I pulled myself up again and peered into the front seats. Both doors were locked and the car keys had disappeared. But don't worry, I found them when I tried to stand up, hit my head on the roof, fell sideways, and landed with them digging into my stomach.  
Maybe Seth decided to go for a little stroll. Or maybe someone decided Seth should go for a little stroll.  
I managed to climb over the seats before the blurry vision came for tea. I changed the radio station to classical and waited for a rational thought. They didn't appear to like me because I waited in the car for half an hour, too scared to move the car in case Seth came back and I was gone. Just to let you know, I blame this entirely on fainting and dysfunctional brains.

I nearly died when my cell phone started to vibrate in my pocket.

"Hello?" I whispered.

"Nessie, where the hell are you?"

Gabby.

"Um, I'm parked in an emergency lane. It was an emergency."

"What? I can't hear you. Why are you whispering?" she yelled.

"Oh, sorry," I paused to fiddle with volume in the radio, "Something came up."

"Right, because I got a call from Chris's mother wondering if there had been an accident because you were supposed to pick David up an two hours ago."

"Fuck! I mean shit. I mean, just, I can't leave!" I sounded totally unconvincing.

"So when you meant something's come up, I guess it's something with your boyfriend. You could have just said you were having sex, I mean I thought we were passed that-"

"Gabby, for once in your life stop talking. Can you go pick David up please? I don't know how much longer this is going to take." I was starting to formulate a plan.

"Talk about stamina. And, I already walked two miles to fetch him."

"Thank you so much, I'll fill you entire room with chocolate,' I gushed, "But I have to go."

"You better. Just make sure your in time to make dinner. Have fun with him."

"He's not my boyfriend and were not doing anything." I said quickly but she'd already hung up.

Great.

I drummed my fingers on the steering wheel, while trying to get back on the main road. I would go back to the house, check that no vampires were there, check if Seth had left a message somewhere and if not, well, I'd go from there.  
My heart had to restart when someone banged on the passenger seat window.

"Seth!" I screamed and then unlocked the doors.

"Hey, I know my face is kinda messed up, but you don't have to rub it in." he joked.

"Where. Have. You. Been?" I growled.

The smile faded from his face as he held up a plastic bag, "I bought lunch?"

"Not good enough! You should have told me, or left some kind of message!"

"But I did tell you!" he argued, "You started talking about calculus, so I took it as a yes and left."

"How can calculus be a yes? And I don't solve calculus in my sleep!"

Seth snorted and pretended not to wince when I punched his arm. My stomach started to grumble and I decided to yell at him some more later.

"So what did you get?" I asked and watched in amazement as he started pulling out food enough to feed a family of a hundred.

"Just sandwiches and juice," he said simply, and handed me two and a bottle of OJ, before unwrapping one of his six.

We ate in silence, except for when he complained about how the violins were giving him a headache. I grudgingly let him change the station- the violins did sound awful but I wasn't about to admit it. When Seth was finished, he took a deep breath and my stomach clenched, anticipating his words.

"We need to talk." Yep, so damn predictable.

"Yes, like how you hacked into my email, even though I terminated the account." I snapped because, hey, that was something I was dying to know.

"I went back to school. Well, night school, I guess you could call it. They set it up at the Rez for dropouts who wanted to take a high school course. Things were pretty quiet; Jake was completely out of it, so we weren't running patrols and left it to Sam's pack." Here he stopped to check my reaction but I managed to keep my face blank, even though I felt like throwing up, "I signed up for a computer course, just because I was bored and thought it be kinda interesting. Anyway, about half way through the semester we learning how to go through internet history and dig up all kinds of stuff. I borrowed Charlie's computer to practice- I figured since it was only you and Bella- back when she still lived with Charlie- who had used it, nothing nasty would come up."

About six months after Mom turned, Grandpa Charlie moved in with Sue Clearwater. They weren't married or anything, but they certainly acted like it. Anyway, I used his computer because I preferred studying down at La Push, mainly because werewolves never pestered me into getting manicures, or going shopping, or baseball teams, or constantly asking if I wanted apple crumble. I mean I loved my vampire family, but God, couldn't they lay off once in a while? I also loved Sue's lemonade and Leah was great at being completely realistic on whether or not my essay sucked. I don't think she liked me very much but her sarcasm was tolerable and she turned out to be awesome at English and Physics.  
After downing his second bottle of juice, Seth continued, "Anyway, I found old links to an email address, which wasn't one I recognised. As far as I knew, you and Leah were the only ones who checked your email on there. About two weeks later, I found out how to access terminated accounts. Did you know they don't really disappear? There's always a record. Like I was saying, I managed to find the last email sent to that address. And boy, was I surprised. So, I continued digging them up."

I shuddered, remembering the messages he would have read.

"Tell me everything," Seth said gently.

I closed my eyes, feeling the tears I had tried to keep at bay wash down my face.

Then I began to talk.

* * *

**November 2012**

Renesmee's POV

Winter was my favourite season. It meant I had just had my birthday, that Christmas and New Years were coming. It also meant snow.  
I loved the way that my stomach would flip flop in delight when I saw snow begin to fall. I loved catching snowflakes on my tongue, although they usually melted the second they hit. I loved tumbling in to tell everyone about the snowman Jacob and me had built or the snow angel I had made. I loved that every time I came inside Grandma Esme would have something warm for me to eat. I also loved that my vampire family could go out together more, since the shine was never shining enough to make their skin sparkle like thousands of diamonds. Alice (she refused to have me refer to her as an aunt) always dragged me off to Port Headland or one of the bigger cities, for shopping and then Aunty Rose would make me dress up and parade around the living room, as if I was some model. The plus side was that I got a hundred bucks to spend on whatever I wanted each time. I usually bought clothes that I could actually wear without ripping.  
I was heading to over to La Push, via the woods because I could move at the pace I wanted. My parents had finally trusted me enough to make my way over there by myself. I swear, sometimes they treated me like I _was_ five not technically sixteen.  
I heard a twig snap in the distance, which was unusual because I couldn't hear a heartbeat to go along with it. As I moved on, I could distinctly hear footsteps. I grinned; sometimes Jake would try to surprise me halfway, but no matter what I could _always_ tell if it was my Jacob.  
It was weird though, the heartbeat. I should have been close enough to hear it, judging by how near the footsteps were.  
I realised that it wasn't Jacob when nothing suddenly burst into the clearing I was in and tackled me to the ground. Okay, that might sound weird but it's what always happened. We had a system for everything.  
I stopped walking and waited. I was too far away from home for my family to hear me and not close enough to La Push for any wolves. My only hope was that someone was on patrol and would hear my scream if the thing following me was danger.  
You know when something scares the hell out of you, you notice the tiniest details? At that moment, I could tell you the temperature, the thickness of the snow beneath my feet. I could tell you it was currently 1:45:31 pm on November 3rd 2012 before one second was up. Everything was surreal.  
I knew the moment that the person stepped in the clearing that I was in a shit load of trouble.  
I took in the figure before me. Black cloaked, tall and thin. They stood still, and I would have bet you a million bucks that ruby eyes were watching my reaction.

"Hey." I said, because I was extremely stupid.

The hood of the cloak fell back to reveal a powder white face, unchanged from the last time I had seen the leader of the Volturi. The eyes that I had thought were red? They were midnight.

In other words, I was standing in front of an ancient, dangerous and extremely bloodthirsty (both literally and theoretically) vampire.

"Renesmee." The way he said my name made me want to step on broken glass. It was like we had bumped into each other at the corner store and stopped to chat because we were best friends and all.

What I wanted to say was:

"Well, what up home dog? I have never seen you before in my life, except for that time when you were about to kill my whole family."

What came out was:

"Aro."

Classy, Ness, classy.

"How … unusual to see you here." He said conversationally.

"Yeah, I don't live nearby or anything."

Something flashed in his eyes, and I sincerely hoped I hadn't just pissed him off.

"I was hunting. Looking for some lonely hiker," He continued like I hadn't spoken, "But then I remembered that of course there wouldn't be any hikers. It's winter," Here he smiled, "It was wonderful I found you, Renesmee. You see, your blood is as good as any hiker. Perhaps, maybe better?"

I swallowed loudly as he came closer. I found myself retreating.  
Surely, surely, he didn't want to eat me. I mean, I was valuable to him, right? That little voice in the back of the head that liked to be sarcastic, piped up: _But there's others like you. What are you but a nuisance? I bet he hates your guts; he never got to fight the Cullens that he so much feared. He'll kill you right now, if he wanted. Or take you._

"Don't know about that. I probably have some venom in me too." I said casually, remembering that animals could smell fear and maybe if I sounded brave he would be fooled.

"Probably."

But he still advanced towards me.

It occurred to me then he wasn't going to kill me, he never had planned to. It also occurred to me that someone was right behind me.  
I spun around and came face-to-chest with another vampire. Great.

"Heh."

I was sooooooo awesomely brave.  
It was about then that vampires starting popping up left, right and centre. And I'm not kidding. They were everywhere. I was surrounded.  
How the hell did Alice not see this one coming? How the hell did no one notice the number deaths go up in the area? An army (almost) of vampires would need to feed regularly.  
Because my brain sometimes liked to be smart, I worked it out.  
They must have had express tickets or something to get here in a day, which meant they were here for a reason. I was ninety-nine percent sure that reason was to kill us. And bag some 'guard dogs'. How many times had I teased Jake about that, just because I was too scared to really talk about what happened that day?  
I began to shake and I was pretty sure my face was as pale as a vampire. I then felt the familiar tingling all over my body.  
Of course, Alice wouldn't have seen this because I was involved. Sometimes she got a clearish picture, when I wasn't growing too quickly, but I knew her vision would be black right now. She wouldn't be thinking it was weird; just that I was at the Rez chilling with werewolves. That tingling I sometimes felt indicated I was growing right then, making me as unseeable as Jacob.

Fuck, shit, damn.

* * *

_There'll be switching between years and months quite a bit from now, because I'm doing lots of flashbacks. Hopefully it'll make sense to you guys, but if_

_ not leave a review or pm me and I can clear it up._


	18. Chapter 15: Confessions

_Hey guys, got this up as soon as I could._

_I just want to remind everyone that the chapters aren't in chronological order. Double-take at the bold print when you see it; that's where the dates are._

_Enjoy!_

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Chapter Fifteen

Renesmee's POV

**September 2013**

On a scale from one to ten, I would choose an eleven point five. That was how much I didn't want to walk out of my room.

Don't get me wrong, I _love_ my birthday (unlike my mother) but I hadn't exactly told anyone, and I was pretty sure Seth would remember the date. I'd stencilled it in every year on everyone's calendar down at La Push and werewolves had excellent memories. I think the one that would remind Seth the most, was when I'd dressed up Jake as a fairy princess, when I was turning four. More commonly known as fifteen to my human friends from school. Ah, good times.

The problem with Seth remembering my birthday is that I wasn't sure about everyone else's reactions; if they'd be angry I hadn't mentioned it. Okay, that is a lie.

Don't tell anyone I told you this but I'm terrified of balloons.

I'm not quite sure why, maybe because I'd been accidently locked in a room of expired helium balloons (long story) for a few hours when I was one and a half.

I'd never admitted it to anyone besides Jacob. Nevertheless, with Dad being a mind reader and all, I'm pretty sure the whole of my vamp family knew- I hadn't had balloons on my birthday ever since. Jake had promised me he wouldn't let any wolves know, but I knew that it might slip up because of the sharing minds thing. Especially since he thought it was _cute._

So, you see if Seth told everyone that it was my birthday, there was a ninety-five percent chance that there would be balloons.

I mentally reprimanded/calmed myself and fixed my poker face in case of any balloon attacks. I turned the handle and stepped out into the passageway. So far so good. I walked quickly towards the open plan area. Peering around the wall, I saw everyone in numerous stages of ready-for-work/school-ness. Most importantly: no balloons.

"Morning everyone." I said cheerfully.

I received a grunt from George and Sam (who still wasn't talking to Seth) and a "Have you seen my mascara?" from Gabby. I could hear Seth in the shower and David getting dressed for school.

Okay, it seemed no one knew I was officially six years old or that they weren't acknowledging it. I was down with that because, hey, two (or six) could play at that game.

"Hey, who finished the milk?" I asked, still slightly nervous that some balloon man was going to emerge from the ceiling.

"You're friend. What's his name, Greg?" George said.

"Seth," I corrected and wondered how you could get Greg from Seth.

The cover story was that Seth was an old family friend, who was backpacking around Europe with a group, when his wallet was stolen. After some vague issue with the insurance, it became apparent that Seth couldn't financially go on. Instead, he applied for a job in mechanics and a working visa. He was granted one and told his friends to go on without him. When I had found out that news from my family (I pretended that I emailed them regularly) I had met up with him. I told this to George who was wondering why an extremely tall and toned man kept appearing inside his house. Eventually he figured out that Seth was actually sleeping on the couch, but he wasn't too angry. Probably because I turned on the waterworks and I don't think he knows how to deal with a crying woman.

_Woman. _I was still getting used to that term being applied to me. I guess I was one, a woman, albeit closer to a young woman- if that made sense. I had gone through another growth spurt during the three months I had been here. My hair was twelve inches longer and I was closer to five foot four then I normally was. My hips flared out and chest was fuller, defining what I imagined would soon be an hour-glass figure. The colour in my cheeks had returned, my lips had become bow shaped and my face was a little more oval. I didn't think I was pretty, just attractive.

Anyway, Seth had become an add-on to this little (so to speak) family. Apparently, there was a little hut thing in the far corner of the back garden, so I cleaned it up and managed to make it look respectable. It wasn't anything special, just a bedroom and bathroom for Seth to stay in.

It become harder, on the other hand, to convince Sam and Gabby of why I was there.

George, being a wimp, had left me to sort the mess out by myself. It was tough but I didn't bring it up with him in case he didn't know, uh, the full story about me.

I had to keep adding in bits of information about back home. Like mentioning that an Aunt was pregnant, my cousin had been accepted into Harvard and that Dad had broken his arm. I enjoyed telling them the last one over dinner. Especially when Seth had to bolt from the table so no one (except me) could hear him laughing. I told the others that Seth had been experiencing unusual bowel movements and they'd nodded in sympathy. I don't think anyone quite looked at him the same after that.

Basically, I had told them that I discovered that there were a lot of 'nanny' positions over here and had applied because I wanted my CV to look good. When they asked in what context I needed it for, I just replied with a vague "Oh, you know. Doesn't hurt to try." and nervous laughter.

After I had found an alternative breakfast than cereal, I made sure David was ready for school and went to finish up in the bathroom.

"Knock, knock." A voice called from the bedroom door.

"In here." I yelled, but since I was brushing my teeth, it probably sounded like "Imf ewer"

"Wow, your bedroom makes mine look like an outhouse."

"Hey, Seth!" Or: 'Hwy Eff!"

I rinsed before continuing the conversation, "What's floating your boat?"

"I have a present for you. Happy Birthday!" I froze at the mention of birthday and quickly glanced around for balloons.

"You're safe." Seth said.

I was mortified; he knew about my balloon phobia!

"I haven't told anyone. Is it the Swan blood in you that makes you terrified of aging?" he laughed.

Oh. I could handle him thinking I didn't want people to know.

"I love my birthday! I just didn't want to make a fuss," I said, recovering, "I heard something about a present?"

Seth grinned and handed me a brown package. I eagerly opened the paper but my movements slowed once I realised what it was.

The photo would have been taken about three years ago; I looked around thirteen or fourteen. It was St Patrick 's Day and Alice had me dressed in a pretty green summer dress, even though it was raining outside. Jacob was just in a pair of faded jeans. We didn't feel the cold, me and my Jacob. I conjured up the memory.

**March 2010**

Renesmee's POV

"Smile!" Alice said and snapped a photo of me and Jake.

She disappeared to go torment someone else with the camera, although I think she preferred making albums of me, what with my accelerated growth. Alice never wanted to miss a moment.

"Hey, Jake." I sang happily, realising something very important.

"Hey, Ness." he replied, horribly out of tune.

"Guess what?"

"I'm the most amazing person you have ever met?" he suggested.

"Try that again in, um, never!" I laughed and danced around the sofa he was sitting on.

"Aw, I don't know, c'mon you're killing me."

"You're not wearing green." I burst out and sent mental signals to my father, and Uncle Jasper would probably pick it up my excitement too.

It was weird, whenever I was excited or surprised or upset, once my vampire family knew they would be there in an instant.

That meant Uncle Jasper or my father would tell Uncle Emmett or Grandma Esme, and eventually the whole family would come.

Jacob's face paled, "Oh no."

"Oh yes," Mom said delightedly and my whole family was suddenly in the room.

I think we pinched Jacob for half an hour straight. Except for Aunt Rose, she instead threw a dog's food bowl at him. There were bruises that lasted longer than two days.

**September 2013**

Renesmee's POV

"Thank you, Seth." I whispered, after showing him the memory.

I felt embarrassed that there were tears in my eyes, but I couldn't help it. I missed everyone so much and I desperately wanted to be back in my parent's arms.

"I saw it on the mantel piece at Charlie's. It felt kind of instinctual to take it. Once I knew I was coming here, I packed it."

"Thank you again. Really, it means a lot to me." I gave him a hug before going and sticking it to my wall. It looked out of place but I liked it.

"Well, I'm off to work. Have a great day being six!" he grinned and ruffled my hair.

"See ya." I called as he exited the room.

The rest of my birthday was uneventful, I dropped David- who was still excited about starting school, even though he had been there for three weeks already- off and ran a few errands. I was surprised, however, when Gabby presented me a birthday cake after dinner. It was nice to be sung to and feel like I had a family again.

I was getting ready for bed when Seth came in.

"I get it." he blurted.

"Get what?" I said confused.

"Remember when you told me, told me everything?" Seth's eyebrows were drawn together as if he was concentrating really hard.

"Yes," I said warily. We hadn't talked about it after that day.

"And you said that you didn't want to go back, but that you did want to, so much so that it hurt? Well, it feels like that now."

"Oh, Seth." I wrapped my arms around his chest, "It's okay."

He ended the hug quickly and said awkwardly. "Night Ness."

"Goodnight," I replied but he had already left. I had a feeling he had teared up.

I climbed into bed and brought the memory up. I was talented at that; probably because I showed people them all the time. Well, just vampires and werewolves and the odd human.

**August 2013**

Renesmee's POV

"I was surrounded. They were _everywhere._ I just stood there shaking. It was terrifying."

Seth spoke for the first time since I had begun.

"Does anyone know about it?"

"I didn't – couldn't- say anything to anyone."

"I'm so sorry Nessie."

"Why? It wasn't your fault." I said gently and smiled reassuringly at him, even though I was still doubting myself from November.

"If you had said something, maybe we could have helped. Maybe you can go back, if I tell Edward." Seth's tone was pleading, almost as if we were back last year and I wasn't in Volterra, and he wanted me to tell everyone else.

I shook my head and said firmly "No."

"But don't you want to go back home?" Seth said, still in the same tone.

"I don't want to, Seth. I _can't_ even though I could. No way. I don't want to," I struggled to make my words form coherent sentences, "But God, I want to go back. So badly, it hurts me, Seth. My heart feels like it has shifted around inside my chest. It feels all wrong, like it doesn't belong where it is. Every time it beats, it hurts so much. Almost like if I don't go back it will kill me," I smiled sadly, "But I if I do go back. Well. Everyone else will be killed. No, I couldn't do that."

"Wow, Nessie. I-" Seth said roughly.

I held up a hand to stop him, "Let me finish."

He nodded and scooted closer, just like a child. I remembered that's what he was, what I was. Isn't is funny how we are way beyond our years, just because of Fate? Fate, that Seth's werewolf gene had been triggered. Fate, that my mother had managed to fall pregnant.

"Aro started talking again. My shuddering increased in frequency and speed. His tone was awful."

_

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If any of you found the switching confusing, remember that you can leave a review or pm me, and I'll try and clear it up for you :)_


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